conspiracy unneeded
by Mosquito
Summary: Harriet’s got a plan, but is it really needed? And with everything else going on, will Harm and Mac ever really get together?
1. Default Chapter

Title: Conspiracy unneeded Author: Mosquito Date: 15-06-02 Summery: Harriet's got a plan, but is it really needed? And with everything else going on, will Harm and Mac ever really get together? Dedicated to Alecia, for believing in me, you're the best friend a person could ever want. Thank you.  
  
Prologue: The Plan  
  
Harriet had a plan. It just had to be put into action. So, on a Friday night she invited some of her closest friends to her and Bud's house. Once everyone had arrived she stood up and addressed the crowed: "Now, you all know why I asked you all to come. We have a problem at work that needs to be solved ASAP. The colonel and the commander are so blind to each other's feelings that they're pushing each other away unnecessarily." She looked around and saw people nod. "Plus the fact that we know they love each other, but won't do anything, it's driving us up the wall. Just as we think they've gotten their head out of their sixes- they don't. So, I think that it's time to take the matter in our won hands and put them together."  
  
"How do you plan to get them together?" Sturgis Turner asked. As Harm's friend and Mac's confident he knew that they wanted to be together. He had the hard evidence: The actions of both of them, Mac telling him that she loved Harm, and Harm telling him about the pact they made to have a baby when AJ Roberts was five.  
  
"We need to lead them into the position, so, I thought that we should come up with a series of events. My cousin once designated a week as a together week when her marriage was failing. In this week they went on dates: Dinner, movies, the theater, and things like that. Only thing is that we have to get them to go. That might be difficult."  
  
"We could just get them to come places with us and then leave them there," Sydney -the admiral's girlfriend- offered.  
  
"I've got a better idea," the Admiral spoke up, "But it'll take a little setting-up. I'm going to make a couple of calls. Why don't we take a recess until tomorrow and then adjourn tomorrow at, lets say the same time, but at work. That way Harm and Mac'll be gone and we have the resources and space to ourselves."  
  
Everyone nodded and agreed to meet. 


	2. 

"Hey, Mac, you busy tonight?" Commander Harmon Rabb Junior asked the woman hunched over her desk working.  
  
"Nope, you wanna do something?" Came Mac's melodic voice.  
  
"Well, Harriet and Bud wanted to go out tonight, and I offered to baby-sit AJ. Wanna help?"  
  
"Sure, what time?"  
  
"I'll pick you up at six? How does that sound?"  
  
"Great." She smiled and them looked back down.  
  
Harm went back to his office. He had written a long letter addressed to Mac and had stuck it into her cover pocket when he asked her about baby- sitting. He had written and rewritten the letter multiple times and was still not happy with it, but decided to so something. Mainly give it to her. He could still recall every word written:  
  
To my dearest Sarah,  
  
Where do I start? I have so much to say and too small a vocabulary to say it in. When I think of you my degree in law might as well vanish, because the powerful, large, and tactful words drown out and I am left a blubbering idiot. It is an idiocy derived from an overwhelming desire to hold, love and cherish you.  
  
Sarah, so much time has passed us by. I admit it is my fault: being too scared to commit has kept us astray, but I want you to know that I a ready now, and that all I own is yours. My body, heart and soul. I can offer you no more then my very essence, but then you already own that.  
  
If you're willing to, I'd like to try us. Please let me know of your decision. I love you, always have and always will. Forever yours,  
  
Harmon Rabb Jr.  
  
While Harm was scared of her reaction, he was also glad to get at least some of his emotions off of his chest. At least his conscience was somewhat relieved, knowing that everything had come. He had come clean. Now he just hoped Mac would too. 


	3. 

If there was anything Colonel Sarah Mackenzie hated, it was interviewing women. Men she could deal with, but women were the worst; especially the macho type. Women in the Navy are always out to prove themselves, they have to keep up with the men and be considered equals. However, no matter how male they tried to be, they would always be women: bitchy. That's what Mac hated the most about them.  
  
The interviewee today would be Ensign Jane Perrarie. Perrarie worked on the USS Truman until about four months ago, when she was discovered having an affair with a Captain Richard Matthews, who was a pilot. Or so the file said. Mac looked over at Bud, who was co-chairing the case and found that he was too lost in thought to bother. She shoved her hands into her pockets agitated.  
  
That's when she found the letter.  
  
At first she had thought that it was an old bill she had forgotten about, but closer inspection of the envelope revealed "Sarah" in a neat cursive fly-boy handwriting. She opened the envelope curiously and unfolded the letter. She read it once. Twice. Three times, then looked over at Bud.  
  
"Something wrong, Colonel?" He asked.  
  
'Good question,' she thought, "Um, no, nothing's wrong, Lieutenant." She put the letter back in her pocket. 'Talk about not expecting something,' she said silently to herself. She couldn't think. What was she to do? Did she know what she wanted? All she knew was that it was about time, but whether that was good or bad she wasn't sure.  
  
She tried to pay attention during the interview, but she was only half- conscience of the conversation between Bud and Ensign Perrarie. Her mind constantly went back to the letter tucked in her cover pocket. She wanted to take the letter back out and read it, but most of all she wanted to be with Harm. When the interview was over, Mac was escorted back to the car by Bud.  
  
"Ma'am, are you sure that you're all right? You hardly said a word during the interview."  
  
"I'm sorry, Bud. I'm just a little preoccupied at the moment. I need to take care of something, would you mind dropping me off at home?"  
  
"No, of coarse not."  
  
"Thank you," Mac said and then sat silently, listening to the radio for the rest of the trip. When Bud pulled up in front of her building she turned to him and said: "Thanks for the ride. I'll see you later."  
  
"See you later, Ma'am."  
  
Mac got out of the car and entered her building. Once again she pulled out Harm's letter and read it. She felt like a teenager. She was so happy. If she didn't keep herself in check she might be impelled to giggle. "Hold it together Marine." She ordered herself.  
  
The minute she entered her apartment, she ran to her room to find something to wear. 


	4. 

The Admiral had told him to go home! He couldn't believe it. At five o'clock his superior had merely walked into Harm's office and said: "It's late, why don't you go home, Commander."  
  
Harm had answered him by saying: "I still have a lot to do, sir."  
  
"Go home, Commander. That's an order." At that point there was no use in arguing. He picked up his briefcase and his cover and left/  
  
It was odd, but who was he to question the Admiral? He quickly got home and changed. Bud had said that he'd dropped Mac off at home and that she'd been dazed during the interrogation. She'd read the letter. He was sure of it.  
  
On the way to her apartment he kept worrying if what he had done was the right thing. Finally he had reached her door and decided that he would find out soon enough. He knocked her door and for a while nothing happened. Then he heard footsteps approaching the door. His heart quickened, his stomach was in knots, and he felt dizzy. What would happen? The door opened and he saw Mac in fitted and faded jeans with a spaghetti string top. She was beautiful to him.  
  
"Hi," she said.  
  
"Hey."  
  
"You wanna come in?"  
  
"Sure." He seemed to only be able to get out one word at a time. Not too good. "You look great." There, a sentence. Boy, was he proud!  
  
"Thank you," she said shyly.  
  
He watched as she put something in her pocket and then retrieved her keys. She was a vision.  
  
She walked up to him and took his hand. "After we get AJ to sleep, you and I need to talk."  
  
"I know," Harm agreed and then placing a hand on her back, escorted her out the apartment and then the building. 


	5. 

Harriet called the meeting to a start. Everyone had attended, everyone of importance, anyway. "Okay, everyone. This is the second meeting to plan how to get Colonel Mackenzie and Commander Rabb together. Now, for all that don't know it's already started. We've got the Colonel and Commander at our place looking after little AJ. There's probably nothing- romantic going on, but at least they're together. Now, does anyone have any ideas about things we could do to get them together?" Harriet looked around. Everyone seemed to be in thought. There was a moment of silence and then the Admiral spoke up:  
  
"I've got a couple ideas in the making. I won't tell you what they are, but when you hear them you'll know what's going on. However, Commander Turner was telling me that he had an idea."  
  
"Um, yes sir, but it isn't really that strong. It's simple and the result could get them together, but it might also drive them further apart from each other and from us. That's why I'm a little hesitant to suggest it."  
  
"Let's hear it anyway. sir?" Harriet supported him.  
  
"Well, I thought that we might get Harm jealous. We've seen how he reacts when Mac is paid attention to by other men, so I thought that we might play with that idea." Sturgis hesitated for a second, "the only problem is that it's risky and might return them to non-speaking conditions."  
  
"It's a good idea though," said Sydney. "Let's keep it as a last resort, or maybe we can figure out a way to alter it just a little."  
  
"How about sending Colonel Mackenzie off on a TAD assignment?" Tiner suggested.  
  
"Or Harm," Sturgis added, "it amounts to the same thing anyway. That's a great idea, Tiner. They'll miss each other and it'll bring them together."  
  
"I'm not sending anyone anywhere unless I have no choice in the matter." Declared the Admiral. "That'll just give the rest of us more work."  
  
However upon hearing this Harriet watched as Bud said: "I don't need more work then I already have."  
  
"Okay, scratch that," Tiner said, "Then how about we wait to see what the Admiral's ideas turn out to be."  
  
"I agree," Said the Admiral. "We can come back together in a couple weeks."  
  
"If this doesn't work," Sturgis said, "we could always lock them in a closet with food for three weeks." Everyone nodded and laughed. So, on a high note Harriet closed off the meeting, shooing everyone home for the night. 


	6. 

"He's finally asleep," Harm said sitting back on the couch exhausted.  
  
Mac smiled while she cleaned off the dining table of the splattered macaroni and cheese that had gone flying off of AJ's spoon. She went back into the kitchen and grabbing two mugs of coffee, returned to Harm. She handed him a mug and nervously sat down next to him.  
  
No one did anything. They were both nervous. They knew that they had to talk. They had so much to say, but where to begin? Each was hoping for the other to break the ice, but neither dared. Finally Harm pulled himself together. He placed him mug on the coffee table and turned to Mac. "I have so much to say to you, Mac, I just don't have the words to say it with. I guess I could sum it all up by saying that I love you. I want to be with you and I don't care what anyone else thinks. I've been trying to holdback my love for you and do as the Admiral told us the day we met, but it's all in vain. I've fallen in love with you Sarah Mackenzie, and nothing's going to change that. So, I might as well stop fighting it too." He seemed to wait for her to say something, but Mac could make no words come out. "You don't need to say anything. I know that I've held onto you for so long. I'm not expecting you to reciprocate my feelings, I'm merely hoping that you will. I'm hoping that you might have room for me. I'm hoping that I haven't used up all your patience."  
  
Mac had slid her hands into his as a sign of assurance and looked deep into his eyes. She smiled: "I've been waiting for so long, that I was worried that you'd never get here. I haven't given up on you, Harm. I never will."  
  
Harm looked up, his face covered in happiness. Mac waited to see what he would do. Slowly he brought up his hand to cup her face. Mac was so hypnotized by his actions that she couldn't move. She watched and waited as his head moved closer to hers, adjusting so as to mold properly with her. Then when their lips actually touched she seemed to be released from a spell and reciprocated.  
  
It wasn't until Mac heard a soft shuffling that she pushed harm away sorrowfully. She turned and saw AJ walking towards them rubbing tears form him eyes. "What's wrong, Sweety?" She asked.  
  
"I had a nightmare, Aunt Mac." The scared child told them.  
  
Mac looked towards Harm and squeezed his hand and said: "I'm going to lay down with him for a little while. I'll be back."  
  
"Take you time. I'll just watch some tv." Harm told her.  
  
Mac nodded and then got up and escorted AJ back to bed. She put the covers round him and then lay down next to him. "I'm here. I'll fight them all off."  
  
"All the monsters?"  
  
"All of them." Mac whispered. She then lay there for a little while recalling her own childhood demons and how they'd all been real: Daddy being drunk and hitting Mommy, Mommy leaving, her first husband's abuse. She'd never had a chance. 'Ah, but Harm's your chance to do better, Sarah,' she told herself. Then placing an arm over the child closed her eyes and dreamt as well. 


	7. 

There was nothing on TV and when Harm when to look for Mac he found her asleep next to AJ. He smiled at the sight. Mac needed a child. He knew that. He also knew that when she had one she could fight off all the rest of her demons. She had so many. "One day, Sarah," he said almost mutely. 'Someday we'll have children of our own.' Then closing the door he went to the living room to wait for Bud and Harriet.  
  
He didn't wait long. At about nine-thirty they came through the door.  
  
"Where's the Colonel?" Harriet asked.  
  
"AJ woke up with a nightmare, so she went to lye down with him for a while and then landed up falling asleep next to him." Harm explained.  
  
Harriet, smiling as always, nodded.  
  
"Want to have a drink with me, sir?" Bud asked.  
  
"No thanks, Bud. I'm gonna go wake Mac up and then drive the two of us home." Harm, turned back to the bedroom and looked in. Mac was still asleep. "Mac." He said softly shaking her in an effort to rouse her. She just sighed, turned her head and continued to sleep. He tried again with no avail. Then he decided just to pick her up and carry her. So he did. She was as light as a feather. Being careful of her head he carried her out, told Bud to grab his car keys and said bye to Harriet.  
  
He followed Bud out and waited for him to open the door. Then he placed Mac carefully inside. Bud then closed the door and then shaking hands he went back o the house as Harm got into the car. At first he sat there taking her in. She was a vision to him. Then he leaned over and kissed her forehead. It was just a butterfly kiss: he barely touched her. Then he turned back to the road, started the engine and pulled out.  
  
He didn't drive her home. Instead he brought her to his place. Now he needed to wake her up. He did get her up, bit she wasn't conscience of her actions. Much like a father escorting his daughter to the bathroom in the middle of the night, Harm maneuvered Mac into his apartment and then to his bed. He removed her shoes and covered her with a blanket, and then went to sleep on the couch.  
  
That night he dreamed of the woman whom he loved, and that also loved him back. 


	8. 

"Wasn't that adorable, Bud?" Harriet said, getting into bed with her husband.  
  
"What dear?" he answered his wife.  
  
"How the Commander carried the Colonel to the car."  
  
"Hmm." Bud was already falling asleep, Harriet could tell. She snuggled up closer to him and let him envelop her.  
  
"I love you, Bud."  
  
"I love you too, Harriet." He said sleepily. "Goodnight."  
  
"Sweet dreams, my love." 


	9. 

Mac woke up a little disoriented. She looked over for the time and encouraged a glass of orange juice. She sat up and looked at the semi- familiar surroundings: Harm's bedroom. She got out of bed and noticed that she was in her jeans and spaghetti strings. Then driven by marine primal morning instincts went to the bathroom to pee.  
  
Walking in she found her travel bag on her bed. She kept it in Harm's car in case of emergencies. In it she kept toiletries, jeans and a T-shirt, and a spare uniform. She brushed her teeth, took a shower and then changed. She had no make-up, so she'd have to do without.  
  
She walked into the living room/kitchen just as Harm came through the door. He's been for a run and looked really good with his T-shirt and shorts clinging to him. He smiled when he saw her.  
  
"Good morning, sleeping beauty." Harm greeted her as he walked over to her.  
  
Mac smiled at the nickname. "Good morning." She leaned up and kissed him. "Hmm." I missed you this morning."  
  
"Yeah, well, the couch gave me a backache, so I decided to run it off. Did you sleep well?"  
  
"Very."  
  
"Good. Now, I'm going to hop into the shower and then make us breakfast. Think you can hold out that long?"  
  
"I'll try," Mac said mischievously.  
  
"There's my marine." He leaned in and gave her another kiss. Then using all him willpower he had, he gradually pulled away from her, while she stole a couple more kisses. Once he had gone, Mac sat down on the couch.  
  
On the table lay Shakespeare's 'Much Ado About Nothing.' Mac picked it up and opened it. She'd never read Shakespeare before, it had never actually occurred to her to read it, and after the first scene she understood why: She didn't understand the majority of it. The language was so different and, to her, refined. She put the book down, giving up, and encountered a notepad underneath where the novel had lain. She picked it up and found Harm's distinct writing. They were all drafts of letters to her. She sat and read them one by one, each written with thought and emotion. Some were simple and emotional, others were written as if they were opening and closing statements. However, they all said the same thing, They all expressed their love and commitment towards her.  
  
She was so wound up in them that she never noticed Harm come up behind her. She startled when he placed his hands on her shoulders.  
  
"I meant everything I said in them." He told her.  
  
"They're beautiful and endearing, Harm. She looked up at him and was surprised to feel a tear trickle down her cheek. "No one's ever taken so much time over me."  
  
"You deserve it, Sarah."  
  
"I love you, Harm."  
  
"I love you too." Harm told her and leaned down to kiss her. Mac seemed to hold onto him if that was the only thing that mattered to her, and for that moment he was. It wasn't until they separated that she wiped her eyes and flashing him a smile asked him if he was going to feed her.  
  
Harm chukkeled. "Always the marine. Come on, Ninja-girl, let's see what we have."  
  
After breakfast they drove to Mac's apartment to pick up her car and work. Then separately they went to work.  
  
When Mac got to the office she put her things away and sat down at her desk. She had barely started working when Harm walked in with a file.  
  
"Good morning, Mac." He said for the benefit of Harriet, who was standing outside Mac's door.  
  
"Morning, Harm." Their tones were business-like and ready to get down to work. "Are you free for lunch? I'd like to discuss a plea bargain." Harm closed the door and sat down.  
  
"Sorry, I'm having lunch with someone today. My cousin, Alecia, is coming to town today and I promised her lunch. So, if you're free now, I'd like to get this over and done with."  
  
"No problem. I'm offering you twelve years, man-one."  
  
"Manslaughter in the first degree. It was an accident, Mac." Harm tried to reason with her.  
  
"That doesn't justify killing Petty Officer Cordito. People don't accidentally stab each other."  
  
"I'll talk to my client and see what he wants." There was a moment while they went through a couple more cases. Then they fell on the Ensign Jane Perrarie case. "How'd the interview go?"  
  
"Go ask Bud. I didn't hear a word." Mac answered honestly. "I happened to find your letter before the interview and spent the whole time thinking about it."  
  
"Bud told me." Harm smiled. "Just wanted to hear you say it."  
  
"Why you. You- ERG!" Mac said in frustration, while Harm laughed.  
  
"You free for dinner Alecia and me?" Harm asked when her agitation had died down.  
  
"Yup. What time?"  
  
"Six."  
  
"Okay. Pick me up?"  
  
"No problem. I'll see you later." Then with a faulty smile, because he couldn't kiss her, Mac watched Harm get up and leave her office quietly. 


	10. 

The work the Admiral had made him leave yesterday seemed to have doubled overnight. First of all one of the cases he had been working on had turned into a suicide, which meant more paperwork. 'First things first,' he thought, ' he dead guy's gonna stay dead so I'll leave him till last. He began his closing statement for his case this afternoon against Sturgis. He was almost finished when Petty Officer Tiner came to his office.  
  
"Sir, Miss Konyk is here to see you."  
  
"Send her in, Tiner."  
  
"Yes sir." Tiner said and gestured someone in.  
  
Harm stood up as a woman walked in. She wasn't as tall as harm, not by far, but her ladylike beauty radiated off her. Her hair was a magnificent orange- red. All in all, by the look Harm had seen in Tiner's eyes, she was drop- dead gorgeous. Harm remembered Alecia as a child and how she'd turned heads she soon enough avoid. However, that was no longer the case. Was she not his cousin, Harm himself would have dated her.  
  
"Alecia," he greeted her, giving her a hug and a kiss on the cheek.  
  
"Hi, Harm. It's been a really long time." Her soothing voice came out. It was slightly accented towards Canada, but her multiple years abroad had softened it. "I think that the last time I saw you was right before you joined the Navy."  
  
"Wow, that's around seventeen years ago! Come to think of it, had Tiner not shown you in, I wouldn't have recognized you." He smiled. 'Always the charmer.'  
  
"You on the other hand are the same, save your mature look."  
  
"I was a bit of an ass when I was younger, wasn't I?" He grabbed his cover and put it on.  
  
"A bit?" They laughed as Harm escorted her out of the room. On the way out they ran into Mac."  
  
"Mac, I'd like you to meet Alecia Konyk. Alecia, this is my best friend, Sarah Mackenzie."  
  
"Pleased to meet you." Alecia said softly but confidently.  
  
"It's nice to meet you. You going out for lunch now?" Mac asked.  
  
"Yup. We'll see you later. Bye, Mac."  
  
"Bye." Harm watched as Mac confidently walked back to her office, and it struck him how much she'd been jealous of his girlfriends because she'd never held herself so high after seeing one of his many girlfriends. He loved how she was so confident now that they had taken a step in their relationship.  
  
When they got into his car, Alecia seemed to have a faint smile on her lips. "What are you laughing at?" Asked Harm.  
  
"Miss Mackenzie is a beautiful woman."  
  
"Yes, she is."  
  
"And.  
  
"And what?  
  
"And are you dating yet?"  
  
"You were never so curious when we were kids."  
  
"Times change, Harm. People change. So, are you dating her yet?  
  
"I plead the fifth."  
  
"Oh, you lawyers are no fun," She pouted.  
  
"Alecia, what's happened to you?" Harm laughed, "You've become like Chelsea."  
  
"Nope, I'm like Aunt Jolee. Chelsea is much worse then I am."  
  
"Heaven forbid." They both laughed.  
  
While they drove, Alecia told Harm about the family and work in her coffee shop chain: "Star Joe." It was perhaps the most successful coffee shop chain in Canada. She was in the United States collecting more Frank Sanatra item's for her shops. Each shop had unique and authentic memorabilia of the star the shop was themed after and she listed all of the places she owned to date.  
  
After getting out of the car, Harm said: "Why Frank Sanatra?"  
  
"Well, I've been a fan for years. Besides for Sammy Davis Junior, Bing Crosby, and Dean Martin, there isn't really anyone that can sing and entertain as well, though Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers and Gene Kelly, and. as you can see I can keep listing. In any case, these are the people that revolutionized song and dance in the in the worlds of theater, music, and on the big screen. Here's a list of my spots. She said pulling the list out of her pocket and handing it to Harm as they sat down. 


	11. 

"Lieutenant Sims?" Harriet turned around to see Tiner standing behind her.  
  
"Yes Tiner?"  
  
"Ma'am, I think we have a problem. A woman came to see Commander Rabb."  
  
"So?"  
  
"Well, they went out for lunch." Tiner stated. "I think the Commander has a new girlfriend."  
  
"Damn it!" Harriet exclaimed frustrated.  
  
"Lieutenant?"  
  
"Thanks for telling me, Tiner." She said as she fled the library and ran to find her husband. "Is it true that the Commander has a new girlfriend?"  
  
"It looks that way, Harriet. She's really good looking too." Bud informed her.  
  
"Better looking than the Colonel?"  
  
Bud abruptly looked at Harriet and then with a harsher tone said, "Are you insinuating that I look at other woman, Harriet?" He was slightly offended that his wife had thought of such a thing and Harriet could tell.  
  
"You already told me you do, by telling me that the Commander's girlfriend was good-looking."  
  
"I haven't seen her. That's what the Gunny said." He told her sternly.  
  
"Oh, I'm sorry, dear. I'm just worried about our plans for the Colonel and Commander. What if it doesn't work? Or, what if we drive them apart completely?"  
  
"Don't worry. We'll figure it out somehow, now, go do something else before the Colonel hears."  
  
"Good idea. I'd better tell the Admiral." She said and bustled off. She went to Tiner's office "I need to see the Admiral."  
  
"Will it take long, Lieutenant?" Came the Admiral's voice. "I'm expecting the Colonel at any moment."  
  
"No sir. Two minutes at the most."  
  
"Come in then."  
  
Harriet followed the voice into the office. She had always loved her CO's office. It had a way of instilling fear, security, superiority, and home- ness all at once. Perhaps it was because she had delivered baby AJ here that she always thought of it in kind. Others had mentioned that they hated the office, but it would always hold a small piece of her heart. That's why she had named her son after the great Admiral: Albert Jethrow: AJ.  
  
"Now, Lieutenant, what can I do for you?" The Admiral pulled her out of her trance.  
  
"Sir, it seems that Commander Rabb has a new girlfriend. She came and picked the Commander up for lunch." There was a pause of silence where neither said anything. Harriet tried reading the Admiral's face, but couldn't. "Sir?" She said.  
  
"Yes, Harriet, I heard you. Tell the Colonel she will have to reschedule our meeting with Tiner. I'll get back to you, and please let me know when the Commander comes back.  
  
"Yes sir."  
  
"Dismissed." The Admiral said while picking up the phone.  
  
"Aye, sir." Harriet saluted and turned to leave. As she left she heard the Admiral talk to his girlfriend, Sydney. She then did as he asked by telling the Colonel to reschedule and then went back to her work. 


	12. 

Mac couldn't work. The letters Harm had written were going right to her head, that when Mac was called into the Admiral's office she started to dream. She thought of what Harm had said the night before, about the letters she had found this morning, and the letter she had found the day before.  
  
"Colonel Mackenzie, are you listening?" The Admiral bellowed.  
  
That snapped her out of her reverie. "I'm sorry, sir. I've just got a couple of things on my mind, but I'm with you now, sir."  
  
"Good, now, first of all I want you to tell me what's going on with the Ensign Perrarie case."  
  
"I was going to re-interview the Ensign tomorrow. The case has come to a standstill, and Lieutenant Roberts and I both feel like she's withholding something from us."  
  
"Very well, what else have you got?"  
  
"Well, the car theft turned into suicide last night, we've got three accounts of murder on a Petty Officer, and then I've also got a shop- lifting case."  
  
The Admiral seemed to make a note of everything Mac said and then looked back up at Mac. "Okay, now the second thing: I have tickets for Much Ado about Nothing by William Shakespeare and Sydney and I can't go, so I wondered if you'd like our tickets."  
  
Mac's face lit up thinking about the play she'd looked at in Harm's living room. "I'd love to have them, sir."  
  
"Very well. Would you like both the tickets? Do you have someone you can go with?"  
  
"I think so. I just need to find out if he's available."  
  
"Okay." The Admiral said offering his tickets to her. "Are you in court this afternoon, Colonel?"  
  
"No, sir, not till tomorrow."  
  
"Very well. Enjoy the tickets."  
  
"Thank you, sir." Mac stood in attention.  
  
"Dismissed." Mac turned around sharply and left the office. On her way to her own office she saw harm walk in by himself.  
  
"You got a moment, Harm?"  
  
"For you I'd give a day, bit I have to be in court in an hour." He answered.  
  
"It won't take long."  
  
"Then you have my undivided attention." He followed Mac into her office and placed a plastic bag on her desk. "Here's your lunch, Ninja-girl."  
  
Mac looked at the bag and smelled it. She recognized it immediately. Beltway Burgers. "Oh, Harm, you shouldn't have."  
  
"I wanted to. Plus, I know you haven't eaten yet."  
  
Mac automatically dropped her voice to a whisper. "I love you, Sailor. I just wish that I could kiss you."  
  
Harm, too, started to whisper. "If keeping you fed means you'll tell me that you love me, I can wait for that kiss." His smile was large and intoxicating to Mac. She felt weak just having him smile at her like that. Luckily she was sitting, because she was positive that if she were standing, she would never have made it. She would have lost her balance and her legs would have given way- caving in. Mac loved him so much. "What did you want to talk to me for, Mac?"  
  
"Oh," she pulled herself back together, "the Admiral gave me tickets to Much Ado about Nothing, and I was wondering if you'd go with me?"  
  
"I'd love to, I just have one problem. I just bought tickets for the two of us at lunch. I guess we could bring Alecia along."  
  
"Yeah, that would be great. Now we have one ticket left."  
  
"Why don't you ask Webb to come?"  
  
"Webb?" Mac wasn't too sure.  
  
"Yeah, would you rather have Gunny?" Harm quirked.  
  
"No, I guess not. I'll call him this afternoon."  
  
"Okay. Is that okay with you, Mac? Asking Webb?"  
  
Mac sucked everything in. She'd been hoping for a night to the two of them, but now she'd have to go with others. It wasn't that she was jealous. It was more like she was disappointed.  
  
"I have to run, Mac. I have to be in court, but I'll pick you up at seven tonight?"  
  
Mac's mood immediately lifted. "Great. I'll see you later." 


	13. 

Harm lost to Bud. He wasn't pleased that he'd lost, but was happy that his client was going to prison. Harm didn't think that he'd told him the whole truth: Plus there was too much forensic evidence supporting the contrary: That he did do it! Murdering one's next-door neighbor is sometimes the worst and easiest to prosecute. It's either revenge or jealosy. In this case it was the latter. The Seargent had been jealous of his neighbour's wife.  
  
Harm thought about his own nweighbour's wife and decided that thinking of a sixty-five year old woman wasn't the best thing to do. Plus he had better things to think about: Mac. Colonel Sarah Mackenzie had become his thoughts. She was his sun, moon, and sky. She was the reason he got up in the morning and came into work. Now that she was his, he was going to do his damndest to keep her.  
  
Harm walked into Mac's office to find her gone for the day. He did, however, find a note.  
  
Harm,  
  
I'll see you and Alecia at seven, right? Don't be late. You know I like punctuality  
  
-Mac  
  
Harm smiled. 'That's my marine,' he thought to himself. He packed his stuff up and left the office. He met Sturgis in the elevator.  
  
"Hey Harm, heading home?"  
  
"Yup, I'm going to change and then pick up Alecia and Mac. The three of us are going out for dinner."  
  
"Yeah. I've been waiting to introduce the two of them for a while. They're really similar."  
  
"By height, I agree."  
  
Harm chuckkled, "Don't let either of them hear you talking like that, or you'll really be introuble."  
  
"I can take on Mac anytime." Sturgis told him.  
  
"Rather you than me."  
  
"What does Alecia do for a living?"  
  
"She owns a coffee-shop chain in Canada and is going to start opening them into the states. Plus, she's visiting and spending time with me. It's been a while since we've seen each other."  
  
"Oh." Sturgis looked confused. Harm had necer seen him like this. Sure Sturgis had teased him and had been nozy about his love-life, but now he seemed to have another element to it. Harm couldn't quite place it, bit it was there, obvious even. Maybe Mac would know. Sturgis and Harm talked the rest of the time about a case the two of them were working on. Then they took their leave of each other and went their separate ways.  
  
All the way home Harm thought of the awkward conversation he'd had with Sturgis. Even Alecia noticed his quietness. "What's wrong, Harm?"  
  
"No, nothing. Don't worry about it. Come on, we can't be late."  
  
"To pick up Mac?"  
  
"Yeah, she's really picky about people being late."  
  
"Okay," Alecia followed Harm out the door and watched him lock up. "Oh, Harm, before I forget." She dug into her bag and pulled out a small velvet box. "Your mom asked me to give this to you. She said, and I quote: 'I hope he gets his head out of his six and realizes what's been in front of him all along."  
  
Harm looked down at the box and saw three rings: One engagement ring and two simple gold wedding rings. His eyes went wide. He had never seen something so lovely. In awe he picked them up as they descended in the elevator. The engagement ring had a large diamond on it. It was incredibly expensive and equally beautiful. The wedding rings seemed plain on the outside, but Harm easily caught sight of an inscription on the inside of one of the rings. He read it aloud: "With Love ~ Harm. Yours Forever".  
  
Alecia leaned over. "I think it's supposed to be: Yours Forever With Love ~ Harm."  
  
"Oh." The revelation hit Harm. He looked at the other ring but there was nothing in it. He told Alecia. "Your mom said that's because she never had time to get in engraved before they got married. But she wants Mac to engrave it.  
  
Harm nodded. He walked to the elevator and stopped. How did his mother know? She'd met Mac on numerous occasions and they'd gotten along, 'but I never told her that I was in love with Mac.'  
  
Alecia seemed to read his thoughts. "Your mom's known for ages/ Harm, it's obvious what your feelings for her are. I can tell. Your mom can tell. Even Grandma can tell. They're just waiting for you to 'wake up and smell the coffee,' for a lack of a better expression."  
  
Harm was stunned. He walked soundlessly. He had loved Mac for so long, had been secretly in love with her for years, but that his mother know, that Grandma Sarah had known, blew him away. How many others could see it? The Admiral? Would he separate them? The thoughts flew to his head. They talked about other matters like what she'd done after their lunch.  
  
They were five minutes late at Mac's house. When Harm rang the doorbell he encountered a very beautiful Mac. It wasn't that she was dressed particularly beautiful; she was in jeans and a t-shirt that said Marine on the front. Harm remembered the t-shirt. The Admiral had given it to her for her birthday. On the back it said: And proud of it.  
  
"You're late, Flyboy. Five minutes and fourteen seconds to be precise." She walked towards him and planted her lips on his. That's when Harm realized where the exceptional beauty came from: Mac was happy. She was radiating in happiness, which made her look more beautiful.  
  
"Sorry. Alecia keeps me on my toes." He turned to see Alecia looking smugly at them. "What?"  
  
"You two are going out. So, you have taken your head out of your ass, Harm. I commend you. I don't believe it."  
  
Harm's face was definitely red. He could feel the heat surge through his body to his face. He looked over at Mac who was still her calm self. She was looking at him a little curiously, but otherwise normal. "My family apparently is well aware of my feelings towards you." He explained to her.  
  
Mac nodded. Then said: "Meanwhile, Alecia, as much as we do love each other, we can't have other's know. Please, if you see anyone who's military, don't tell them. We could be forced apart."  
  
"They can do that?" Alecia asked.  
  
"Yes they can," Harm brought in, "Especially since Mac is of a higher rank then me. She's full Colonel and I'm only Commander. We could be brought up on a whole bunch of charges. Some of which can result in dishonorable discharge."  
  
"Oh. I understand. I'm not totally clueless about the military. After all my father was a military man."  
  
"Really?" Mac asked.  
  
"Yup. I've traveled the world. I've lived in the UK, Germany, and Russia."  
  
"Wow, I'm only starting to discover the world. Do you speak Russian?" Mac was completely interested. She walked with Alecia, completely forgetting Harm.  
  
"I've forgotten the majority." Alecia told her. "After all, I left Russia after graduating high school. I lived there for three years.  
  
Harm enjoyed how the two of them were getting along. He wouldn't interfere for the world. He even followed them, as they seemed to change cars, to Mac's convertible and sat silently in the back as Mac pulled out.  
  
Finally Mac realized, or seemed to realize what she'd done and looked over at Harm through the rear-view mirror. "Harm, where are we going?"  
  
"I don't know. You're driving." Harm told her and then looked over at Alecia. "Where do you want to go?"  
  
"Take me wherever you usually go."  
  
"I guess we're going to either O'Mally or Edwardo's."  
  
"Let's take her to O'Mally, Harm." Mac said. "You're not married, Alecia?"  
  
"Nope. Not yet." Alecia told her.  
  
"Oh, then we definitely have to take her to O'Mally. It's where all the military people go in this area. It's great."  
  
Harm had actually hoped that he'd get to take them someplace quiet. Somewhere like Edwardo's. It was their (Mac and his) favorite Italian restaurant. However, it didn't seem like he'd get that lucky. The ladies already seemed resolved to going to O'Mally's, the local bar/pub hangout. Without a say, Mac had turned the car round heading for O'Mally's. 


	14. 

It was a good thing that they could get the neighbor's daughter to baby-sit for them. Harriet pulled her husband into the pub. They'd told Commander Sturgis Turner that they'd meet him and Congresswoman Bobby Laytham at O'Mally's at eight. They were early, but their superior and his girlfriend were sitting quietly in a corner bench calmly enjoying the music. Harriet instructed her husband in what she wanted to drink and then headed to the commander.  
  
O'Mally was starting to get busy, and it would only pick up from here, so it was a good thing that Commander Turner had come early to get them some seats. "Good evening, Harriet." Sturgis said the minute he saw Harriet approach.  
  
"Hello Commander, Congresswoman. It's starting to pick up." Harriet slid into the bench next to them.  
  
Bud brought the drinks and placed them on the table. He slid in next to Harriet. "Guess who just arrived?" He pointed to the front door, where they saw Harm leading in Mac and Alecia.  
  
"Who's she?" Bobby asked.  
  
"We think that she's Harm's newest heartthrob."  
  
"Oh. I've never seen Mac so exeptive of his girlfriends."  
  
"Neither have we," Bud told her.  
  
Harriet gazed over at them and watched how Mac seemed so engrossed into conversation with Alecia. It was as if they had been life-long friends reunited. They seemed to be babbling on as they stood at the bar. Then Harriet's eyes contacted with Harm's who smiled and waved. Harriet smiled back and watched as Harm pointed them out to Mac. She too looked over and then began walking towards them with Harm and Alecia in tail.  
  
"Hey Harriet, Bud, Bobby, Sturgis." She greeted them all equally enthusiastically.  
  
"Hi ma'am." Harriet answered.  
  
"It's Mac, Harriet. When will you drop the ma'am?"  
  
"Oh, probably never, ma'am. You might as well give up." Mac slid in next to Bud and then began introducing Alecia to everyone. Alecia slid in next to Sturgis and Harm pulled up a chair and sat between the ladies he'd come with.  
  
Sturgis started up the conversation. "So, I heard form Harm that you own a coffee-shop chain."  
  
Alecia seemed to beam with all the attention, Harriet noticed. 'She's a beautiful woman, I can understand why the Commander's with her,' she thought. 'Now how am I going to get rid of her?' Realizing that what she had thought was horrible; Harriet became really angry with herself. 'But you've been waiting for the Commander and the Colonel to get together. It's okay to think badly about this woman.' She tried to reassure herself, but then thought badly of her reassurance and therefore decided to drop all thinking. She came back to the conversation and listened as Alecia explained the concept of her coffee-shops and how she was expanding her chain into the United States, starting with Washington DC and Virginia.  
  
"Which means that Alecia'll be around more often." Harm interjected.  
  
"That's great!" said Mac. Everyone seemed to nod, trying to be more excited. Mac looked over at Harm "I'm going to get something to drink. I'll be right back. Alecia do you want anything?"  
  
"A Vodka, straight up. If they have Stolichnaya I'd prefer that, otherwise Absolute." Alecia said. "Russia still isn't out of me in that way."  
  
Mac nodded and turned to leave. Harriet watched her turn and then said: "Wait, I'll come with you."  
  
"Okay." Mac smiled.  
  
Harriet climbed over her husband and took orders from everyone else at the table and then went to help Mac at the bar.  
  
"Hey Charlie." Mac called the Bartender.  
  
"Oh, hey Mac. Long time no see.. How you been?"  
  
"Good. I've been busy though."  
  
"I bet. JAG's always busy, I imagine."  
  
"Yup," Mac shook her head only further agreeing.  
  
"So, what'll it be tonight? I've got some great ice-tea for you. My mom's down for the week and she made it. Want some?"  
  
"Oh, that'll be great. Then we also want a vodka."  
  
"Straight?" Charlie looked surprised at Mac.  
  
"Yup."  
  
"What's wrong with that, Charlie?" Harriet asked.  
  
"Harriet," Charlie started, "I can remember every vodka straight up that I've sold. I can count them on one hand."  
  
"Gee, it's really not that common."  
  
"Nope. What else?"  
  
Harriet informed Charlie of the rest of the drinks and then waited as he got them together. Now was the time to get some info. "Colonel, hoe long has the Commander been going out with Alecia?"  
  
"Alecia?" Mac seemed confused, and then she broke out in laughter. "Oh, Harriet, Harm and Alecia aren't dating. They're cousin's."  
  
Harriet looked at Mac in shock. Then the info sunk in and she felt a wave of relief flood over her. Though she felt embarrassed by asking she was glad she did.  
  
Still chuckling Mac collected the drinks and allowed Harriet to take the rest, which she did obediently. Harriet then followed Mac back to the table and began to distribute the drinks to their lawful owners.  
  
"Mac, are you sure?" Harriet looked at Harm eyeing his glass of bier and asking Mac.  
  
"Yeah, Harm. You can't let your cousin drink by herself." Mac replied. Harriet looked over at Sturgis and saw confusion in his eyes, as well as in Bobby's, as well as in Bud's. She leaned over to Bobby and whispered:  
  
"Alecia is Harm's cousin."  
  
Bobby turned abruptly and looked at Harriet. Harriet nodded. It dawned on the congresswoman as it had dawned on Harriet earlier. The two of them looked over at Sturgis who was still lost.  
  
"Sturgis, honey, dance with me?" Bobby asked.  
  
"Sure," Sturgis said. Harriet watched as the two of them excused themselves and went towards the dance floor. She saw Bobby lean into Sturgis and whisper to him. His eyes began to glow, and a smile appeared. Just like Harriet, they too were happy that they didn't have a new girlfriend to deal with.  
  
Just then a man came up. He looked over at Alecia and asked: "Dance with a marine, ma'am?"  
  
"With pleasure." She smiled and got up. "I'll see you guys later. Ciao." Then with a wave she disappeared to the dance floor with a marine at her heal. Harriet's attention turned back to her commanding officered and a smile on Harm's face.  
  
"Sir?" She asked.  
  
"Oh, nothing Harriet. I'm just thinking about how much she's changed. Would you believe me that she was shy during high school?" She could go fire engine red a t time. Now look at her- she's one of the most out-going woman I know."  
  
"That's hard to believe, sir." Bud responded. "When was the last time you saw her?"  
  
"The day before I left for the Navy."  
  
"Wow, that is long!"  
  
"Yeah. Seventeen years." Harm smiled as he watched her slow dance with the marine. It's good to see her again."  
  
Harriet looked at her watch. It was nine-thirty. Where had the time gone? She had promised the baby-sitter that they'd be home by ten because she had a physics exam the next day. She pointed the time out to Bud. He nodded and started getting their jackets. "Are you leaving Harriet?" Mac asked.  
  
"Yes, ma'am. The baby-sitter has to be in bed by ten-thirty."  
  
Oh. Ah, well, it's Friday tomorrow. We can all rest a little."  
  
"Yes ma'am." Bus said enthusiastically as he escorted Harriet from her seat. "We'll see you tomorrow, goodnight."  
  
"Goodnight." Harm and Mac said in unison.  
  
Then with a wave to Sturgis and Bobby, Harriet took her husband's hand and left. 


	15. 

The minute Harriet and Bud had left Mac scooted over and welcomed Harm to sit next to her on the bench seat, which he did gladly. She then slipped her hand into her and picked up her ice-tea with the other.  
  
"Mac, as soon as you've finished that ice-tea, we'll get up and dance too, okay?"  
  
"Sure Flyboy. In the meantime, why don't you tell me what you're so lost in thought about?"  
  
"Ah, but you got it wrong, Mac. I'm not lost in thought." Mac felt as he leaned closer to her. "I'm lost in love."  
  
Mac began to lean in towards Harm. She wanted to kiss him, badly, but he seemed to realize her intentions and put his hand flat against his stomach to stop her. She immediately recognized why. "Sturgis and Bobby." She bowed her head nodding.  
  
"And that's just for starters. Who knows who else is here? This is a Navel hangout. There are Navy and Marines all over the place."  
  
"You're right. but that doesn't mean that I don't want to kiss you."  
  
She watched as Harm looked about. Bobby and Sturgis were still dancing, and Alecia was sitting at the bar talking to the marine. "It seems like everybody is busy. How about we go for a small walk?" Harm offered suggestively.  
  
"Hmm," Mac played along, "that sounds really tempting. okay Flyboy. Let's tell Alecia where we're heading and then we'll go for our walk."  
  
Harm nodded and went towards the bar. "Charlie, how much do I owe you for tonight?"  
  
"Who you paying for, Harm?" Charlie asked.  
  
"Vodka, bier and the ice-tea." Harm replied.  
  
"That'll be four twenty. Mac's drinks are always on the house."  
  
"Really?" Harm said confused.  
  
"Yup. Us non-alcoholic drinkers have to stick together."  
  
"Aha." He fished his wallet out of his pocket and paid the fee. Then he turned to Alecia, "Who's this unfortunate fellow you happened to have picked-up, Alecia?" Harm smiled.  
  
Mac was scared that the marine might take offense and try something, but he merely smiled back and held out his hand. "Sergeant Peter Lawford. And you are?"  
  
Harm took his hand and shook it. "Commander Harmon Rabb. This is Colonel Mackenzie. I trust that you'll take care of my cousin while we go out and get a bite to eat? Right Sergeant?"  
  
"Yes sir."  
  
"Come on, Harm. Charlie said he'd keep an eye on her." Mac took his arm and pulled him out of the pub.  
  
"Do you think that she'll be all right?" Harm asked once they were out of the pub.  
  
"She'll be fine. She's independent, intelligent, and it looks like she doesn't have bad taste in men. He was good-looking, well mannered, educated, and most of all he's a marine." Mac thought back to the Sergeant they'd seen briefly. His hair had been a dirty blond, cut in a crewcut fashion, typical to the male marines. His body had been lean, but well defined and slightly on the muscular side. His skin had been a tanned white, so unlike Mac's was. It was a notch under Hispanic, but a touch above paper white. He'd been dressed appropriately, with a black leather jacket, black jeans, and what was a dark shirt. Mac hadn't been able to tell if it were a dark blue or black, bust she assumed that it was the previous.  
  
Mac looked over at her boyfriend. She could see a look of nervousness over him, one that wasn't unfamiliar. She'd seen it multiple times on his face, especially if the two of them were in danger. This however was their first date, and she wasn't going to let him ruin it. 


	16. 

Dinner had been great. They'd eaten at an Indian restaurant. Harm had made sure he was the perfect gentleman and was extremely proud of himself. Everything had gone perfectly, just the way he wanted it for the woman of his life. Harm loved her so much, but there was so much at stake. Their jobs, their reputations, and so much more. Once they found a way round these difficulties then he would propose. Just then he remembered the gift he had bought Mac days ago and took it out.  
  
"Mac," he started, "I bought this for you a while back, but I never had the opportunity to give it to you."  
  
Mac seemed to be looking at him suspiciously, but took the small box. Harm watched as she opened it, and before long saw the small necklace and charm and then crushed herself against him in a ferce hug. "Harm, it's beautiful."  
  
The necklace was silver and the pendant was a silver rose. When Harm had seen it, it had reminded him of the first time they'd met. To say that they'd met in some ordinary ceremony would be an understatement. Rather, they had met in the White House rose garden. Harm could still remember the encounter as if it were yesterday. How it had not only scared him, but how he'd mystically fallen for a vision. The Admiral had purposely told him to stay friends with her. Now, all those years later he was disobeying his superior's orders and he had no qualms about doing so.  
  
"Harm, it's absolutely beautiful. I love it. Thank you."  
  
"You're welcome." He had planned to say something outrageously sappy, but had not been able to find the words at the last moment. He took the necklace back and turned Mac around so that he could fasten it to her neck. He did it with the fluency of someone who had done it multiple times. Then he leaned down and kissed Mac right behind her ear. Cause and effect, because Mac swirled slightly and lost her balance momentarily. A little worried Harm said, "Mac, are you okay?"  
  
"I'm fine, Harm. I just feel a little overwhelmed."  
  
"Is that in a good or a bad way?"  
  
"Definitely a good way. Thank you, Sailor." She leaned up and kissed him soundly.  
  
"Hmm. I hate to do this, Mac, but I want to go and check up on Alecia." Harm had confessed what had been on his mind and felt good about it.  
  
"Well, then, let's go and see what your twenty-nine year old cousin is up to. They walked back silently, with Mac playing with the pendant that hung around her neck. When they entered the bar, it was definitely not what Harm had expected.  
  
A table had been pulled to the middle of the dance floor and there were people surrounding what looked like two people sitting at either end. Closer inspection uncovered that Alecia was one of the people sitting and on the other side was a very largely built man. Obviously marine. In front of them they each had a shot glass and a bottle of Vodka. The bottles were still full, implying that the game hadn't started yet, and it already looked like they were drinking to see who'd be piss-drunk last. Lawford stood directly behind Alecia while the majority of the marines were backing her opponent.  
  
"Alecia's a sitting duck." Harm told Mac. "The guy she's competing with holds the title for the most alcohol consumption in O'Mally's. I've seen him down six bottles of Jack Daniels."  
  
"I don't know, Harm. The guy's pretty tipsy already, and Stolichnaya isn't just vodka. It's Russian vodka, and if you haven't drunk it may times before- that we know Alecia has- then you really can't handle it. I thin she'll win."  
  
"Are we betting that a small woman can out-drink that huge Marine?"  
  
"Absolutely."  
  
"You're on. What happens if I win?"  
  
"Whatever you want." Mac said deviously. "And if I win?"  
  
"I'll do your file reports for a month." Harm said, though he seemed unsure.  
  
"You're on!"  
  
The minute they'd agreed they heard Alecia's voice: "Do you understand the rules?"  
  
"Bring it on." Came the dark and heavy reply.  
  
"Very well. Nasdarovniya." Then Harm watched as Alecia lifted her glass, saluted her opponent and then downed the liquid. She closed her eyes as id absorbing it and then opened them and refilled her glass. Her opponent had just sat there and watched her take the first drink. Then he too picked up his glass and swung it down. Harm gathered that the taste must have been awful, because he scrunched up his face.  
  
"You can take a piece of lemon, it reduces the taste." Alecia said plainly. But, the man was a marine, and if she could do it lemon-less, so could he.  
  
The game went on for ten minutes, at which point Alecia's opponent couldn't find his glass anymore. Alecia sat with her eyes closed, concentrating on her breathing. Lawford was busy collecting all her earnings and then lowered himself to her height and asked her if she was okay. Harm and Mac, whom had moved closer, listened as he voiced his concern.  
  
"Commander Rabb's going to kill me. If not him, then Colonel Mackenzie definitely will." He told her.  
  
"Well, I don't know about Mac, but Harm won't. I got myself into this mess, and I got myself out. As long as I figure out how to walk before they get back we'll be fine."  
  
"Too late." Harm said.  
  
"Damn." Came Alecia's reply.  
  
"Sir, ma'am, I can explain." Said Lawford. However Alecia interrupted, "It's my fault. We were talking about how I only drink vodka and I said that I could out drink anyone, well, that guy," She pointed to the marine who lay on the table, "said that he had the title and that he could beat anyone. So I bet him that he couldn't, and that's how it started."  
  
Harm could tell that her voice was slightly slurred and that she would have one hell of a hangover in the morning. "Well, Sergeant Lawford, is that what really happened?"  
  
"Yes sir."  
  
That's when Mac butt in. "Don't worry, Lawford, you're off the hook. Alecia just won me a month of no paperwork, so I relieve you of all pain."  
  
"Thank you Ma'am. Is there anything I can do? I still feel responsible for letting her get into that."  
  
Harm thought got a moment. Mac and he could bring Alecia back. That was no problem. He looked over at Mac. "Actually, Lawford, I have as extra ticket to Shakespeare's Much Ado About Nothing, for two weeks from now. Could you be Alecia's escort?"  
  
"Yes ma'am, I'd love to, if that's okay with Alecia."  
  
"I'd love to have you along. I wouldn't be stuck with these fossils." Alecia looked up at Harm and Mac and smiled.  
  
"Who you calling fossils?" Harm asked.  
  
"Come on Cuz, let's go home. I think I can walk now." With Harm and Lawford's help she managed to stand and get into the car.  
  
Harm left her at Mac's apartment and then with a goodnight kiss from Mac he turned and went home. 


	17. 

Harriet came into the office much happier than she'd left it the night before. She'd called the Admiral as soon as she'd gotten home the night before. Bud had tried to persuade her to wait and tell the Admiral at work, but Harriet had refused and a good thing at that. The Admiral had been very pleased to hear the news and had hung up in good spirits.  
  
Now the Admiral had called a staff meeting, and she was really hoping that everything was all right. She wrote her list of 'to do' things as she walked to the conference room. She took her regular seat between Mac and Sturgis ready for the meeting. Everyone, except for the Admiral was accounted for. Across from her sat Bud tapping his pencil on the table and making the most god-awful noise. She leaned back in her chair and with a swift kick to the shin Harriet got her husband to stop. Bud looked at her a trifle angrily; bit that ended the second the chef-de-post entered the conference room. Everyone stood up in firm attention.  
  
"Be seated." Said the Admiral, to which everyone relaxed back into his or her chairs. "Now, this meeting was actually placed for an announcement, but it turned out that we have a few more things to discuss before we get to that. So, I guess I'll start with the good news, the Sec Nav is retiring." Harriet could feel her heart soar. That was the best news she'd heard in a long time. "Well," the Admiral continued, "because he's leaving he wants to have a retirement party. It'll have all the important people, the Chiefs of Staff, the president, the other Sec Nav's, heads of the various departments, politicians, and of coarse all the husbands and wives. You're all invited; however, he wants some sort of contribution from everyone, no matter how big or small. First of all, he wants a live Navy band. I know for a fact that quite a few people here are musically talented, so, commander Rabb, I'm putting you in charge."  
  
"Yes sir."  
  
"Good. Now, as I said, we're in charge of the entertainment. So, see what you ca do. Now, onto other business, Colonel Mackenzie, I want all of your files distributed out. Commander Turner, take care of that."  
  
"Sir?" Mac asked.  
  
"It's a personal matter, so I think it best that I tell you in my office."  
  
"Yes, Sir."  
  
"All right, that's it for this morning. Dismissed." The Admiral got up and headed out the room. "Colonel, in my office now." He called back. Harriet watched as Mac picked up her stuff and followed. 


	18. 

As soon as Mac entered the Admiral's office he asked her to sit down. She sat and waited as he got to his won chair and sat in it. "Mac, I hate to tell you this, but your Uncle is dying." The Admiral's voice was very sympathetic, as he told her the news. He seemed to be informing her and giving his condolences at the same time.  
  
"Sir, what? How?" Mack caught herself stuttering slightly.  
  
"Cancer. They discovered it recently and have determined that it's much too late to do anything. I'm giving you an extended leave. Take as much time as you need."  
  
"Thank you, sir."  
  
"I'm really sorry, Sarah." Mac looked up at him. This was the first time he had called her by her first name.  
  
"So am I." She said softly.  
  
"Go on, keep us informed, would you?"  
  
"Yes, sir."  
  
"Good. I'm giving Commander Rabb the rest of the day off as well. That way he can send you to the airport. Would you like me to tell him, or will you?"  
  
"Could you do it, sir?"  
  
"Of coarse. Send him in on your way back to your office."  
  
She nodded and then turned and left the room without even waiting for a dismissal. She looked over at Tiner and asked him to come with her to her office, which he did willingly. On the way she encountered Harm. "The Admiral wants to see you."  
  
"Everything okay, Mac?"  
  
"No." And with that she continued into her office. Safely inside with a closed door she turned to Tiner.  
  
"Ma'am, I'm really sorry, what do you need me to do?" Tiner asked.  
  
"First of all, I want you to give me the address to the hospital. Then I want you to get me on a flight. Last bus not least; get me a place to stay as close to the hospital as possible. I'll pay for it."  
  
"Anything else, ma'am?"  
  
"No, that'll be all." Mac looked down at the piles of work and handed then to Tiner on his way out, to give to Sturgis. Then she started rummaging around her desk for something she might need. Taking the photo f Harm and her at the JAG-a-thon out and packing a few other tidbits she put it in her bag. She waited for Tiner to get back to her.  
  
Tiner walked into her office, "Ma'am, the address." He handed it to her, "And there isn't a military transport heading there today, so I booked you on an airplane to the closest airport. Is that okay?"  
  
"That's fine, Tiner."  
  
"It's American Airlines flight AA714. It leaves at 1200." He gave her the info and left. Mac made a note of everything and then moved to the couch to wait for Harm. She didn't wait long. A few minutes later she saw him come out of the Admiral's office, relay something to Bud and then go into his office and fetch his cover and briefcase.  
  
By the time Harm had gotten to her, Mac had poured her mind with images of her uncle and was lying on her couch crying. It wasn't that she was bawling, but more like a constant shed of tears. When she felt someone lift her from the couch and take a seat next to her, she felt fear, anxiety, and pain wash over her and she left herself be enveloped in her love's arms. 


	19. 

'How can I ease her pain? How can I take it away? All I want to do is be happy with her. Can't we just be happy? Is that so hard? Hasn't she had enough? Why does she need to suffer anymore?' Harm held her as she cried what else could he do? What else would he do? He loved her so much, that to just hold her and comfort her made him feel all the better.  
  
"Why, Harm?" She whispered between the tears.  
  
Harm thought back to when they'd declared his father dead. "My mother once told me that the world's an awful place and that bad things always happen to good people. However, dying is just a relief. That way, they go to heaven and nothing bad can ever happen to them again." He didn't know if that would be helpful. It hadn't helped when he was a boy, because he had never understood it, and was impatient, but Mac couldn't fall in either of the two categories. If his words could give her some comfort, he would be the happiest person on the planet.  
  
Mac had quieted down. She seemed to just be resting against him. "You always know what to say Flyboy. Thank you."  
  
"I love you, Mac, and this time I will be there for you."  
  
"I know, thanks." Then with a semi-smile she picked her stuff up and headed out the door. Harm followed her with close precision. He had never seen her so openly devastated before, and he knew that for a while there would be little he could do, but he hoped to make all the difference to her. 


	20. 

Harriet watched as Mac and Harm left the office. Mac's face was red, showing signs of tears. She walked with her shoulders hunched forward, her face down showing all the signs of defeat. Harriet was worried. Never had she seen her closest friend like that. After they had left she went to the Admiral's office. Even before asking for permission Tiner said: "Admiral's expecting you. Go on in."  
  
"Thanks," Harriet replied and knocked on her CO's door.  
  
"Come in." She heard the Admiral's boisterous voice. Harriet opened the door and walked further in strict attention. "Take a seat lieutenant Sims."  
  
"Thank you, sir." She said and sat down very lady-like and faced her CO.  
  
"You want to know what's wrong with Colonel Mackenzie, I take it?"  
  
"Um, yes sir."  
  
"The Colonel's uncle, Colonel Matthew Mackenzie is dying of cancer. Short of a miracle there's no chance of survival. They've said that it's a matter of days before he dies."  
  
"Oh, sir. Is there nothing that can be done?"  
  
"I'm afraid not, Lieutenant."  
  
Harriet Hung her head. "Sir, you will let me know if she needs anything?"  
  
"I'll be sure to. Dismissed." Harriet stood up and then turning to the door began to leave. "Harriet?" The Admiral called. She turned and looked at him. "What she needs is a good friend."  
  
"Those she has plenty, sir." Then with renewed confidence she left the office. 


	21. 

"And now on WT 101.5 Billy Joel with 'Goodnight Saigon." The radio flowed with music once again.  
  
We met as soul mates On Perris Island We left as inmates From an asylum And we were sharp As sharp as knives And we were so gung ho To lay down our lives  
  
Mac listened to the words numbly. This was her uncle's favorite song. She new all the words and used to sing it.  
  
We came in spastic Like tameless horses We left in plastic As numbered corpses And we learned fast To travel light Our arms were heavy But our bellies were tight.  
  
Uncle Matt had always told her how true this song was. His days in Vietnam were actually as the song described it. She'd never really taken it to heart until she went to serve in the gulf war. In the trench there she hummed the song and as if for the for the first time, realized it's meaning.  
  
We had no home front, We had no soft soap, They sent us Playboy, They gave us Bob Hope, We dug in deep, And shot on sight, And prayed to Jesus Christ, With all of our might.  
  
That's what she was doing now: praying that Uncle Matt would survive. Just then Harm's hand left the steering wheel and came to the radio to change the station. "Please leave it." Mac said softly. She looked over at him and saw his worried face, but he nodded. She then turned back and stared out in front of her.  
  
We had no cameras, To shoot the landscape, We passed the hash pipe, And played our Doors tapes, And it was dark, So dark as night, And we held onto each other, Like brother to brother, We promised our mothers we'd write, And we would all go down together, We said we we'd all go down together, Yes we would all go down together.  
  
Tears fell. Mac couldn't keep them in, no matter how much she rubbed her eyes.  
  
Remember Charlie, Remember baker, They left their childhood, On every acre, And who was wrong? And who was right? It didn't matter in the thick of the fight.  
  
Mac felt as Harm's hand rested on hers and then grasped it. He'd pulled the car over and as he pulled her into his arms she broke out into spasms of tears. Then he pushed his seat back and pulled her onto his lap and she came willingly. She wept in his arms unashamed and stripped of strength.  
  
We held the day, In the palm, Of our hand. They ruled the night, And the night, Seemed to last as long as six weeks, On Perris Island, We held the coastline, They held the highlands, And they were sharp, As sharp as knives, They heard the hum of our motors, They counted the rotors, And waited for us to arrive, And we would all go down together, We said we'd all go down together, Yes we would all go down together.  
  
"Why Uncle Matt?" She yelled. 


	22. 

'She's asleep thank God. She's so stressed out and spent. She's trying to accept that the only man who wasn't cruel to her in her youth is on the verge of death.' Harm had left her in the car asleep and had run up to her apartment to pack. He them returned and started driving towards the airport. She hadn't awoken, and he hoped that she wouldn't awake until they reached the airport. That's why, when his cell phone rang he made a dash to pick it up. It rang twice before he got it, but still she slept. "Rabb." He answered.  
  
"Commander, where are you at the moment?" The Admiral's voice was loud coming through the phone.  
  
"On the way to the airport, Sir." He said softly and then added, "Mac's asleep."  
  
"That's good. She's going to need her energy when she gets there."  
  
"Yes sir. "  
  
"Commander, is it too late to return now?"  
  
"Yes, Sir. Especially if Mac's going to make her flight."  
  
"Very well. Tiner booked you a seat next to Mac and I'm sending Bud to pick up a few things for you from your apartment. He'll meet you at the airport.  
  
"Sir?" Harm asked confused. Him going along hadn't been the original plan. Though happy, he wondered where the Admiral's change of heart had come from.  
  
"Commander Turner reminded me of what Mac's Uncle meant to her and got me to at least let you go along for moral support. In actual fact everyone on staff wants to go along, but we still have an office to run. So, since you're her best friend, and since you handled her uncle's case to begin with, I thought it might be a good idea to let you go along. I want you to be the judge on how long you thing you need to be there and call and tell me. If he's on the verge of passing on, stay there."  
  
"Yes, Sir. Anything else?"  
  
"Yes. I'm sending some work along. For you and Mac, incase you need something else to focus on."  
  
"Understood. Thank you, Admiral, and Mac probably appreciates this too."  
  
"I hope so. It will hopefully lover her burden a little. Keep me informed Commander."  
  
"Yes sir." Then he turned his cell phone off and out it in his pocket. He briefly looked over at Mac. 'Why you? Haven't you suffered enough? All I want for you is to be happy. All I want to do is make you happy.' Looking back at the road every few seconds Harm concentrated on getting them to their destination. Once at the airport he decided that he'd kiss her awake. His sleeping beauty, he smiled at the thought.  
  
He tried to find a parking space. He hoped that Bud would take a cab, which would allow for Bud to take his car back into town. Less expensive than keeping it at the airport for who knew how long, but the minute he shut off the engine Mac woke up. His absolutely heartwarming idea flew out the window.  
  
"Come on," Harm said.  
  
Mac nodded and then followed suit by getting out. She grabbed her duffel from the trunk and then walked into the airport. Harm ran to catch up with her. "Hold on, Mac, I'm coming with you/ We have to wait for Bud to bring my stuff. He'll be here soon." He showed her to a bench and then pulled out his cell phone to call Bud. 


	23. 

Harriet sat with her husband on the way to the airport: they were almost there. They had barely another ten minutes to go when Bud's cell phone rang.  
  
"Harriet," her husband called, "would you get that for me? It's in the right pocket."  
  
"Sure." She leaned over and stuck her hand inside his pocket and retrieved the phone. "Hello?" She answered.  
  
"Harriet, it's Harm."  
  
"Hi Commander, we're almost there. Give us about ten more minutes."  
  
"Okay."  
  
"How's the Colonel doing?" Harriet's concern kicked in.  
  
"She's in shock, Harriet. I'm worried about her."  
  
"Just as long as you keep her away from the alcohol, everything will turn out fine."  
  
"You've got a point, Harriet, thanks."  
  
"No problem." Then Harriet listened as Harm told her where they were. "We'll see you soon, Sir." She said and rang off. "The colonel's in shock. " She told Bud.  
  
"That's understandable, Harriet. Her closest relative is dying. She's going to be depressive and in shock for a while. I remember that's what I was like when my mother died. The colonel and I aren't very different in many ways. Both our mother's died, and it catalyzed violent behavior in our fathers. Only difference is that I had to think about Mikey."  
  
"Do you think that if you hadn't had to take care of your brother you would have ended up like her?"  
  
"Probably. She'll pull through. She's done it before, and she'll do it again."  
  
"I just wish that there was more that I could do for her."  
  
Bud placed his hand on her knee and patted it. "Just be there for her, Harriet. When she needs something she'll know where to go."  
  
Harriet nodded and sat back waiting to get to the airport. She didn't wait long, because about five minutes later they drove into the airport parking place. Bud got the bag out and they walked hand in hand into the departure hall. It wasn't that they were being romantic, as most of the on-lookers would like to have thought, but rather, it was a sense of comfort. Having been married for three years gave one luxury of knowing what will help the other. Harriet thought about how Bud had always been there for her: when their daughter died at birth, when her parents tried to get her to leave the Navy, when she gave birth, and so much more.  
  
They saw the Colonel and the Commander sitting together on a bench near the entrance. The Commander's arm was slung over the Colonel's shoulders as they talked softly. They walked slowly and came to stand in front of them. Commander Rabb looked up and then stood up. "Hey Bud, Harriet, thanks for bringing my stuff."  
  
"No problem sir." Bud said to him.  
  
"Sir, Ma'am, if you need anything call us." Harriet added.  
  
"I will. Do you have the files?" Harm asked.  
  
"They're in the bag, sir." Bud told him.  
  
Harriet moved and sat next to the Colonel. "Ma'am, I want you to know that we're all here to support you. Okay?"  
  
"Thanks, Harriet." Mac leaned over to hug her. Harriet accepted it readily and then looked up at her husband. "Bud, we need to go and pick up AJ."  
  
"You're right, Harriet. We hate to leave you, but we really need to go."  
  
"We understand, Bud. Go on. Give him a big hug from us." Harm said.  
  
"Yes sir." Harriet smiled. Then with a few more kind words to the Colonel they slowly moved to leave. 


	24. 

Mac was in such a state of shock that she didn't notice Harm check them in. Nor did she remember getting on the plane or it taking off. Only when they had arrived at the hotel and Harm told her to go and take a shower did she realize where she was and what was going on. Once again she began to cry and slipped down and crawled into a corner of the shower.  
  
'I don't' understand why it had to be Uncle Matt.. What did he do to deserve it? . Wasn't Leavenworth enough? . What am I going to do without him? - I'm going to fall off the wagon - I can feel it. Pain, so much pain. It's like Daddy hitting me!' Then she turned her head violently as if to argue with someone else. 'You're a marine, Sarah Lynn Mackenzie. You can get over it! You're strong! You have to be strong for Uncle Matt. He's going to get better.' She hung her head then in defeat. 'What's the point. I know he's not going to die. that's not going to change.'  
  
She sat there looking at her feet that were now tucked under her body. The tears were till being mixed with the shower water. She wished she was drunk, or at least dead.  
  
"Harm," she whispered. "I need Harm- Harm." She said a little louder, but the noise of the shower still overpowered her voice. "Harm." She tried a little louder, but it was once again in vain. She was instantly reduced to tears. She wallowed in her tears for what seemed like an eternity, and then out of nowhere the water stopped. She looked up to see Harm reaching for a towel. He then went up to her and picked her up.  
  
He let her wipe and dress her, and then put her to bed. She watched as he undressed and then putting on his night attire slid in next to her. Had she been in a correct state of mind she would have made all kinds of comments; however at that moment her mind was blank and her mouth too dry to talk. With him next to her, Mac scooted until she could lay her head on his chest. She barely heard him say that he loved her before she succumbed to sleep. 


	25. 

Harm was awake before Mac: she was still enveloped in his arm. He felt like he could protect her from the entire world like that.  
  
He got up and then grabbing his cell phone he went to the balcony. He dialed with an accurate knowledge of whom he was calling. Within two rings someone picked up. "Hello?"  
  
"Admiral? It's Harm."  
  
"Harm, how is Mac?"  
  
"Far from okay." He paused. "I'm scared that she'll go into depression. Yesterday I found her crying on the bathroom floor."  
  
"That's understandable, Commander. She's losing her uncle."  
  
"Yes. Sir." Harm agreed.  
  
"Harm, just do me one favor, make sure she doesn't take a drop of alcohol. We can't have a Colonel with a renewed drinking problem."  
  
"Yes, sir."  
  
"Keep me posted."  
  
"Yes sir." Harm promised. "I need to go now, sir. I'll be sure to keep you informed. I'll call when I know more about Major Mackenzie's status."  
  
"Very well." The Admiral said and then hung up. Harm moved back to the bedroom and sat in a chair looking at Mac. He's just sat down when she was jerked forward by a small voice.  
  
"I kept my eyes closed hoping that it wasn't true, but it is isn't it?" Mac's voice shook. "I'm in a hotel next to the hospital where my uncle in dying."  
  
"Mac.."  
  
"Just your voice tells me it's true. Her voice sounded disappointed and sad. She rolled out of bed and shuffled towards the bathroom where she locked the door.  
  
Harm turned his attention towards the window. Time just seemed to slip by whilst his thoughts drowned out as he dazed off. So, he hardly noticed when Mac came out of the bathroom covered in a large hotel towel.  
  
"Harm, your turn." Her voice 'woke' him up. He got up and planting a kiss on her lips he went into the bathroom to shower. 


	26. 

Harriet was worried. Bud was working himself to death; AJ was cranky because he didn't get to see his father anymore, and then Mac.. She hoped that Mac was alright.  
  
"Mommy, is Daddy home yet?" AJ's voice rang in her mind.  
  
"No, Daddy's not home yet, AJ."  
  
"When's Daddy coming home?"  
  
"Late, now, do you want me to read you a story?" She picked up her son and headed to his bedroom.  
  
"Yes please."  
  
"Okay." Harriet placed him in his bed and tucked him in. "What was Daddy reading to you?"  
  
"The book of fairy tales Grandma gave me." The child told her clutching the blanket. Harriet picked up the book. 'A World of Fairy Tales collected by Andrew Lang,' she read to herself. She opened the book to the story indicated by the bookmark and began to read.  
  
"The Fairy of Dawn. A story from Pakistan."  
  
"Where's that, Mommy?" AJ interrupted.  
  
"It's in Asia, next to India."  
  
"Oh." AJ settled back into his bed.  
  
"Once upon a time what should happen did happen; and if it had not happened, this tale would never have been told." Harriet stopped and reread it. 'Odd sentence,' she thought. "There was once an emperor, very great and mighty, and he ruled over an empire so large that no one knew where it began and where it ended." Harriet began reading. While she read she admired the beautiful pictures and the marvelous story. She was so engrossed in the story that she didn't realize that her son had fallen asleep. She put the book down and leaned over and kissed his forehead. Then after turning off the light she closed the bedroom door and went to bed.  
  
Usually she would wait for Bud, but there was no telling what time that would be. She got into bed and then leaving the light on, fell asleep.  
  
Harriet was awoken at two in the morning by a noise downstairs. She got up and followed it to the kitchen where she found Bud with an open shirt drinking a glass of milk. She ran her hand down his chest and rested her head against his. "Hi Bud. Did you just get in?"  
  
"Yeah. Harriet, would you do me a favor?" He asked her in the most distraught voice she had ever heard.  
  
"Of coarse, Bud."  
  
"Next time I say I think it's time I get some responsibility, tell me I'm crazy and remind me of all the work I'm doing right now."  
  
Harriet smiled gently and nuzzled her husband's hair. "You're doing fine, and I'm really proud of you."  
  
"Thank you." He got up and put the glass in the dishwasher and then taking Harriet's hand he led her to bed. 


	27. 

Mac opened the door and walked in. She hated the sterile white walls. Everything about them was depressing. Their evenness of color and the fact that there was absolutely no contrast gave chills down her spine. Their message was one she feared: we are all dieing.  
  
She remembered an old mission that had taken place in Iran so many years ago. Her partner on the mission, a sergeant Ahmed Abdul had been her cover traveling as her husband. They had once reached a camp where they were all wearing white. White, not being unusual to the natives due to the temperature, seemed different in the small village. The garments were all freshly washed and the women were also in white. "In Iran, white is the color of death. The innocence is brought out in the burial, because the deceased is returning to Allah." Ahmed had told her, and now the walls made her heart ache as it had then, when they had joined to pay respects to the dead boy.  
  
She held Harm's hand as they moved towards the elevator to the floor her uncle was on. They were not on their own, and to make matters worse, just like every other elevator ride she had ever been on: no one talked. Perhaps it was just a rule of silence designated to the box, because it was merely a cupboard suspended on cables to transport people from floor to floor. Should one of the cables snap they would die instantaneously? Mac cleared her mind of the useless and what seemed like masochistic thoughts and concentrated on the people traveling with her. She didn't look at Harm for fear of what he might see. He was aware that she was broken. She'd never let him see her like that before, and she had never readily cried openly in front of anyone except for her uncle. Harm always thought that she was strong and that she could handle everything. She'd ruined that thought of her.  
  
The woman across from her smiled at her, but Mac couldn't muster the strength to reciprocate the gesture, causing her to look at her feet uncomfortably. She noticed the dirty linoleum floor and followed the lines of the squares. Then she counted them. There were six vertically and nine horizontally, that made about fifty-four squares. Mac looked up to see what floor the elevator had reached: one floor away. She looked down at the hand that was still holding harm's and felt him squeeze. She looked up at him. Unlike the woman he didn't smile. Mac wished that he had. It might have made it all the more easier. Instead she looked in his eyes and saw the strength in it, and what seemed like pity towards her. She hated pity. She had always abhorred the way people could pity each other. She had caught herself doing the same thing many times, but she had learned over the years that some people could be pitied. Those who landed up in situations because of what others did, were to be pitied. That is what the word was for, or so Uncle Matt had taught her.  
  
Uncle Matt. Now lying in a bed on the verge of death. He was going to leave her. He had promised that he wouldn't, but he was. He lied to her. He had promised. Mac was once again on the verge of tears when the elevator door opened, and what seemed like an endless ride was over far too soon for Mac. If she could have prolonged arriving at their designated floor she would have. She pulled herself together and stepped out.  
  
They headed down two passageways until they reached the door with his name on it. Mac stood in front of the door and closed her eyes. She could do this; after all, she was a marine. Then reaching for the door she opened it and took a step into the room.  
  
It was blinding. The ghastly white blinded her like nothing she had ever encountered. The stench of death hung and Mac was more aware of the spiritless body than ever. She looked him over and was shaken by the sight. It was her worse nightmare coming true. She had known that it would one day happen, and she had been worried that if he had been off in a foreign country she might never see him again. Body or none. She should probably be happy that she would get a last moment with one of the most influential people in her life.  
  
With Harm's strength from behind, she walked closer to the bed. Her Uncle was asleep. She sat in the chair next to him and said: "I'm here, Uncle Matt." Taking his hand she surveyed his face. It was a color she had seen on corpses in battle. It was a decaying color, a way to show that the body was failing and that it could no longer sustain itself. Then panic arose, the steady beeping on the ECG became a steady line, and Mac watched as he faded away. She laid her hand on his chest and waited for the last beat. Then, in shock she sat back down and stared off. 


	28. 

Harm pulled out his hand phone. First he dialed the Admiral. However, he got Tiner on the line. "I'm sorry Commander, but the Admiral's talking to the SecNav and he doesn't want to be disturbed."  
  
"I don't care. Get me the Admiral now, Tiner!" Harm yelled.  
  
"Yes, sir." Tiner said exasperated. A couple minutes later the Admiral was on the phone.  
  
"Commander, what's going on?"  
  
"Uncle Matt passed away, sir." Harm said in defeat.  
  
"When?" Came the somber reply.  
  
"Right after we arrived. It seemed as if as soon as Mac came he died. He just let go. Mac's in a state of shock and as much as I can console her it doesn't help. I'm at a loss sir."  
  
"Call your parents, Harm. Maybe they can help her." The Admiral seemed to pause as if in thought. "I can't free myself at the moment, but I'll send someone. Ask the hospital to prep the body for burial, and also alert the nearest Marine base and Leavenworth.  
  
"Yes, sir." Harm said, "I guess I'll call my mother."  
  
"You do that, son." They hung up. Harm then searched his hand phone for his mother's number and dialed. As usual he let it ring ten times and then disconnected the call. Then he tried his step-father's office number. Once again there was no response. Last but not least he decided to call his apartment to inform Alecia about what had happened, but that too went unanswered. Bewildered at where everyone could be he turned back to the room where Mac sat with an empty bed.  
  
A nurse walked by. Harm informed her of their plans to relocate the body asked her to make contact with the relevant marine bases. Then he returned to Mac. She was staring off across the room. A faint tear trickled down her cheek. Harm squatted in front of her and wiped it away. He didn't know what to say, nor did he think that saying anything was appropriate. Eventually Mac just held out her arms to him waiting to be held, and he held her. They fell asleep like that and were woken up hours later by the voice of Harm's mother.  
  
"Sarah? Sarah, it's Mom."  
  
"Mom?" Harm heard Mac's voice say. This woke Harm up so that he could see his mother and her husband.  
  
"Hello, Harm."  
  
"Hi Mom. How'd you know to come?" Harm wondered.  
  
"Sarah called Alecia this morning to tell her what was going on, and because she couldn't come she called me. She's always been such a kind and considerate young lady."  
  
Harm looked back at Mac who was once again asleep. "She's taking it hard." He told them.  
  
"I can understand why." His mother said. "From you told me, he was everything to her."  
  
"He was." Harm agreed. He turned to Mac and shook her gently. "Mac, Mom's here. Get up, honey."  
  
"Hmm?" Drowsy from her sleep she looked at her visitors, "Mrs.-" She began, getting up.  
  
"No, Sarah, it's Mom, okay?"  
  
"Okay, Mom." She smiled.  
  
"And Frank's Dad or Frank. Harm just calls him Frank."  
  
Mac nodded, not having decided. Then looking at the bed. "I need to start preparing the funeral."  
  
"Already being done." Harm told her.  
  
"Oh." She looked back at the bed.  
  
Harm thought of what they could do. He needed to get her out of here. "Let's go and get something to eat. You haven't touched anything since this morning."  
  
"That sounds like a good idea." Frank said. "Come on, Sarah, let's get you out of here." He helped her out of the chair. Harm looked at him and knew that it should have been him to help her, bit his mother had held him back, and he knew why: Frank had never had children of his own and Harm had treated him horribly when he was young. This was his chance to be a father, and it wasn't for harm to meddle with. Harm hung back as they walked out of the hospital. He smiled at how his mother and stepfather had taken to her. He loved her so much and as soon as he got a promotion her was going to propose. Maybe he'd ask the admiral to put in a good word for him. In any case he decided that she'd had enough trauma in her life and he for one wasn't going to let that happen again. Only happy things from then on. 


	29. 

Harriet went nuts with fright when she heard what had happened. She was worried about Mac. She was devastated. She felt helpless all the way in Virginia, not being with Mac. If she were there she could try to comfort her. Here she could do nothing. Just then Tiner walked up to her. "Lieutenant Sims?" He asked.  
  
"Yes Tiner?"  
  
"I was wondering if you could help me, ma'am. See, the Admiral has put me in charge of preparations for the funeral, but I have no idea what I have to do and where to start. Will you help me?"  
  
'Maybe I can do something for her after all," Harriet thought. "Of coarse I'll help you. Let me get some things out of the way and then we'll start, okay?"  
  
"Yes ma'am. That would be perfect."  
  
"Good I'll meet up with you shortly." Then she watched Tiner go back to his desk. Though sad about the occasion, she was glad that she could do something to help the colonel. She sat at her desk looking around, and then taking a big breath she reached into her bottom drawer and retrieved a large book. In it she had collected the few things she had of her daughter Sarah Harmony Roberts. In it she still had a list of names and places that had done the funeral. She flipped through the first few pages not wanting to get stuck on her daughter as she had in the past. She remembered once crying so hard that the Admiral had been forced to get her to go home and take it easy for the rest of the day.  
  
She looked for the relevant information and then she went to Tiner's office. She replayed her little girl's funeral in her head. She remembered everyone being there to support her. She was so small, only as big as a precious jewel. Harriet had many a time wondered what it would have been like if her girl had survived.  
  
"Lieutenant?" came Tiner's voice.  
  
"Yes, Tiner?" She answered.  
  
"Are you okay?"  
  
"I'm fine," Harriet replied, not too sure if sounded like she was fine, but Tiner didn't push and she was glad that he didn't. "I've got a list of phone numbers and people we can ask about how to proceed. Now, this is a marine funeral, so it'll be a little different than a Navy one. We should, however, first call Arlington cemetery to make sure that they lay a space for him, we can ask them what our next step should be."  
  
"Yes, ma'am." Tiner said reaching for the phone number and then with a smooth movement he picked up and dialed the number she had offered him.  
  
Harriet sat next to him and listened in on the conversation. "This is Petty Officer Tiner, I'm calling on behalf of Colonel Mackenzie. Lieutenant Mathew O'Hera passed away this morning, and I have been asked to prepare the funeral." There was a brief silence as he listened to the reply given to the introduction. "Yes, sir. Could you please hold on? . Thank you?" Tiner looked up at Harriet. "Ma'am, they would like to know when we can come down to Arlington to have a look at a place." He said.  
  
Harriet thought for a moment. She still had about two hours of paper work to do, and she was supposed to pick up AJ after school. She glanced at her watch and noted that it was half passed eleven. "If you have a free lunch hour, Tiner, we could go then." Harriet decided.  
  
"Yes, Ma'am." Then returning to the conversation. "How about twelve- thirty, sir?" There was a moment of silence which Harriet imagined came from the man looking at his own appointment book. "Yes, sir. Twelve-thirty. Thank you, sir." Then Tiner hung up. The appointment is at twelve-thirty, ma'am. If we leave at twelve we should have time."  
  
"Alright. They'll take care of everything. We need to put an obituary in the forces paper and in the Marine Magazine, or whatever they have. As soon as we have all that submitted then we'll be done."  
  
"I'll draft an entry today and I'll get it to you, ma'am."  
  
"Good. Then, I'll see you at twelve o'clock, Tiner." Harriet said getting up.  
  
"Aye ma'am." Tiner, being a gentleman also got up as she did, and only sat down as soon as she left.  
  
Harriet went back to her desk to find her husband sitting in her chair looking at the scrapbook. He looked up at her as she came closer. "I didn't know that you had this," he said.  
  
"I made it right after she died. The councilor told me to. It helped. I pull it out when I need to feel close to her." Harriet said softly leaning against the desk.  
  
"Is everything okay, Harriet?" Bud asked.  
  
"Yeah, I needed some phone numbers for Tiner so that we could get in touch with the places for the colonel's uncle." Harriet said. Then taking the book back she placed it back in the spot she had originally pulled it from. "Tiner and I are going to Arlington during lunch to look for a place for Colonel O'Hera. I should be back by two o'clock at the latest." Then picking up the files that Commander Turner had requested earlier that day, Harriet went to find him. She knocked on his door and then hearing an acceptance to enter she opened the door and walked in. She saw Congresswoman Laythem sitting in the chair across from the Commander. "Excuse me, Sir." Then turning to the congresswoman she said: "Hello Congresswoman."  
  
"Hello, Harriet. I hope everything's okay." The congresswoman answered back.  
  
"Besides for the passing of Colonel O'Hera, everything's going well today, thank you." Harriet replied politely.  
  
The congresswoman must have looked at the Commander oddly, because he said: "Mac's Uncle."  
  
"Oh," Ms. Laythem gasped. I'm sorry to hear that. "Please give her my condolences."  
  
"Yes, ma'am." Harriet said, then not missing a beat said: "Commander, I have the files you requested." Harriet walked up to the desk and laid them down. "Tiner and I are going to Arlington this afternoon. We have an appointment at twelve-thirty. Is there anything I can do for you until then?"  
  
"Commander Turner looked around his desk and shuffled a few things around. Then finally declined saying that he'd be in court all afternoon, after which he dismissed her.  
  
Walking back out of his office Harriet went back to her desk. She had another fifteen minutes before they had to leave. She picked up the memo she was writing and then placing it in Commander Rabb's in box she put her cover and handbag together on her chair and made a quick stop to the bathroom. When she came back Tiner was waiting for her. She grabbed her things, and then followed him out of the building.  
  
They sat in the car and then waited. "Tiner?" She asked.  
  
"The Admiral is on his way. He wanted to come along, but told us to go ahead to the car and that he'd be there shortly." Sure enough their CO walked out of the front door of the building being saluted by half a dozen personnel. Then getting in, they drove off.  
  
During the ride to the cemetery the Admiral made small talk with Harriet, asking how little AJ was and what he was up to.  
  
"He's doing well, sir. He's enjoying kinder garden and it's such a hassle to get him home half of the time. He just doesn't want to leave." The Admiral laughed.  
  
"You should bring him round to my place sometime this weekend. We'd love to have him over."  
  
Harriet thought for the moment, "Well, Bud and I did want to go and see his father."  
  
"Is there anything wrong?" The Admiral asked.  
  
"No, Bud's just a little worried about him." Harriet said.  
  
"Then, bring AJ to us. We'll make a day of it. If you bring him Saturday at about ten, we'll spend the day with him, and then the two of you can join up with us for dinner. How does that sound?"  
  
"Wonderful, sir." Harriet smiled, and then sat back in silence for the rest of the ride.  
  
The cemetery was quiet. It was beautiful though. Whoever said that a cemetery had to be ugly and scary had obviously never been to Arlington. The sun was warm on Harriet's face as she walked side by side with the Admiral. Tiner took up the rear behind them looking around at the carious graves. The Admiral led the way to a large building just off of the cemetery and held the door open for Harriet. Harriet walked in and waited for Tiner to come in and find the person they were looking for.  
  
An hour later everything was prepared. 


	30. 

"Where are you going?" Mac had put on her tracksuit and was on her way out. She thought that she might go work out for a little while, especially because Harm couldn't. He'd injured his back a couple weeks prior and was on Doctor's 'bed rest', because of a run. Mac wanted some solitude to think and she was sure that she could have that on a treadmill.  
  
"I'm going for a run. I want to think a little. I'll see you later, okay?" She looked to him for permission and then with it gave him a kiss and left. She began her run on a treadmill, but soon grew tired of the fact that she wasn't going anywhere, that she left the hotel to go running on the street. She soon found a park and trying to enjoy the scenery ran and thought about her uncle. 'He would have loved running in a place like this. He loved the trees so much. I wish I could have run with him one more time.' Her thoughts then strayed to memories of the times they'd spent together at his place while she was growing up.  
  
Over to her right a loud group of voices broke her thoughts and she looked over. There she saw a group of people talking, drinking and eating. Normally she would have minded her own business and gone on jogging, but something compelled her to stay. She moved into the crowd and before she knew it someone came up to her. "What's your poison?" He asked her with a strong middle-eastern accent.  
  
"It used to be tequila and vodka long ago."  
  
"Why? What changed you?" His accent intrigued her.  
  
"I became an alcoholic."  
  
"That's why you stopped?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
He chuckled giving off a low and loud noise from his very inner self. "Back home in Iran, everyone is an alcoholic, but that doesn't stop us." He pushed a can of beer into her hands.  
  
"You're from Iran?" Mac asked.  
  
"Yes. I moved here when I was a teenager." He told her. "Why do you ask?"  
  
"Well, I speak Farsi." Mac explained.  
  
"Truly?" He said in Farsi.  
  
"Truly." She answered in his tongue. She lifted the can to her mouth and took a sip. The alcohol stung and she closed her eyes savoring the feeling.  
  
"Good?"  
  
She nodded. This was maybe just what she needed to take away the pain, and she followed as he led her to sit down. 


	31. 

"Where is she?" Harm roared. He was so worried about her; she'd been gone over three hours. After the first hour he had decided that she really needed to let out some steam. After the second hour he had started pacing back and forth. There was nothing his parents could do to help him: he was worried. By hour three he was frantic. There was absolutely no news from her, and his parents were getting worried too. His mother was now no help at all. She was pulling all the worst-case scenarios out of nowhere. His stepfather, fighting to keep everyone positive, kept throwing out excuses. However, Harm could read through him, he was just as worried as the rest of them.  
  
Eventually Harm had had enough. He'd left his parents to go look for her. First, he to the gym, but the trainer said that she'd left after about 30 minutes, she thought. Keeping his head straight, Harm went down to the lobby and found out that she had definitely left the hotel, probably going for a run. The doorman seemed to think that she'd head to the park. This being his best lead, Harm took the directions and turned to the indicated direction.  
  
After a few minutes of walking around the park, trying to avoid people sitting around eating their lunches and talking, Harm stumbled on an area covered with police and yellow tape. It wasn't long until he found out that there was a bunch of people laying on the ground drunk, with the police shoving them into a van to put them into the drunk-tank. 'She wouldn't drink. She's been back on the wagon for about four years. She wouldn't do that. would she?' determined to stay open-minded Harm decided to go to an officer.  
  
"Yes?" His deep and throaty voice came out.  
  
"I'm looking for a woman. She's got brown hair, brown eyes, about five-four and a half, she's wearing sweat pants and a t-shirt that says: Annual Jag-A-Thon." He wrung his hands nervously. He wanted them to have her, but at the same time dreaded it. If she were with the police she would be drunk. If she were drunk, then she would have fallen off the wagon. If she'd fallen off the wagon, which meant that they would have one hell of a time getting her back on. This was not good. Silently he prayed that she wouldn't be between mass of hooligans.  
  
"Was she a member of the party lying around here?" he waived his arms pointing at the people passed-out. Harm noticed that fact that he had one arm in a sling and that his good arm did the gesturing.  
  
"Not really, but I'm worried that she might have joined them. You see, someone close to her died this morning, and she's a little unsteady." That was an understatement.  
  
The officer looked him up and down and then curiously wondered: "Who are you, sir?"  
  
"I'm," Harm paused thinking of what to say, "Harmon Rabb, I'm her boyfriend." He didn't want to make this into a military issue, so he didn't identify himself as navy.  
  
The officer hesitated but then pulled out his walkie-talkie. He relayed the information while walking away from Harm. Ten minutes later he came back. "Is her name Sarah Mackenzie?"  
  
"Yes sir." Though worried, Harm was relieved that she had been found- no matter what her condition was.  
  
"They have her downtown. She's very drunk and violent. She beat up one of the officers. If you can calm her down then we'd be much obliged."  
  
"I can try, sir." Harm said firmly. "Where can I find her?"  
  
"The forty-sixth precinct. Take a cab."  
  
"Thank you."  
  
"The officer released a grunt and then went back to work. Harm went to call his mom and a cab. In the cab he pulled out his cell phone. He dialed the number he dreaded and waited for an answer.  
  
"Judge Advocate General's office. PO Tiner speaking, how may I help you?" Tiner's voice came through the phone.  
  
"Tiner, I need to speak with the Admiral." Harm told her.  
  
"He just went home, Commander." Timer informed him.  
  
"How long ago?"  
  
"Maybe about ten minutes ago. He's taken a driver, so you should be able to reach him on his cell."  
  
"Thanks Tiner."  
  
"Anytime, sir." Tiner said and then disconnected.  
  
Harm dialed his superior's personal number and waited for him to answer. After about three rings he did: "Hello?"  
  
"Sir, It's Harm."  
  
"What's wrong Commander?" The Admiral asked worried. "What's happened?"  
  
"It's Mac, sir." Harm paused. "She's in the city police drunk tank." There was silence as Harm waited for his commanding officer to reply, however, none came. "Sir?"  
  
"I heard you. I'm thinking."  
  
"Yes sir." Harm apologized.  
  
"Have you seen her yet?"  
  
"I'm on my way there now, sir."  
  
"Good, stay with her, and get her out. You're her council if need be."  
  
"Yes sir." Harm said. "Are you going to send someone to relieve me of it?" Harm asked, knowing full well that because he was involved he could not be a council. He was too close to be of any help.  
  
"I wish I could relieve you, but I've got the Sec Nav up my back, and I can't do much. I'll send someone though. Get her out first, Commander, then call me back."  
  
"Yes sir." Harm said and then waited for his CO to cut the connection. When he did Harm noticed that he'd reached his destination. He paid the driver and then rushed into the precinct.  
  
* * * 


	32. 

"Mommy, when is Uncle Harm and Aunt Mac coming back?" AJ asked his mother as they sat to eat. Harriet looked at the small boy and smiled gently. "Aunt Mac said that we are going to see Pandas."  
  
"Did she?" Harriet picked at her peas. She was still thinking of her little girl. It had been hard to go to Arlington during the afternoon. Then she turned to Bud, "could you take care of AJ, I'm not feeling all that well." She noted the concern in her husband's face as he nodded to her. She nodded back and then leaving her plate, she walked out of the kitchen.  
  
"Is mommy okay?" She heard AJ ask his father.  
  
"Yeah, she's just not feeling well. She'll be fine. How about we clean up and then go and watch a movie?" Bud tried to arouse his son's curiosity.  
  
Harriet couldn't make out the rest of his words by the time she reached her bedroom. She changed her clothing and slipped into bed. She looked at her side table and picked up the picture of her family. It had Bud, AJ, her parents, Mikey, and herself holding her new daughter. A nurse had taken the picture the day before she died. They were so happy. The last time she'd felt that happy was when she had given birth to AJ. She placed the picture on her lap and picked up the next frame. This was a picture of the Colonel and the then commander with Sarah. Colonel Mackenzie had Sarah in her arms, and Commander Rabb had them both in her arms. They looked so happy. They were glowing as if the child were theirs. In some respects, Harriet had wished it were. If she had been theirs, Harriet would not have lost a child, but at the same time Harriet would have regretted not having another child.  
  
In the 24 hours that she had known her daughter, Harriet had learned so much. Though she had lost Sarah, she had become stronger, and so had her marriage. She and Bud were taking each day at a time, and trying to be happy with their son. He had become their priority.  
  
Bud and her needed some time to themselves, she realized. She thought of asking the Admiral, but decided against it. Congresswoman Laythem's birthday was the next day, so that wasn't option. Out of habit Harriet picked up the phone and dialed Mac's number. On the second ring a woman picked up.  
  
"Hello?" Harriet registered who it was and quickly answered.  
  
"Alecia, it's Harriet."  
  
"Oh, hi Harriet! How are you?" Her voice was so soothing, and Harriet felt safe confiding in her: so she did. Harriet, in tears, told her of her difficult pregnancy and the never-ending pain the birth was. Then she told her of the happiness she had felt afterwards; how she had cried of happiness at seeing her daughter. She told her of how her little Sarah had become a victim of SIDS, and how she had died in her arms. Then she told her about how she had turned to her husband, but had found no comfort, and how the commander's girlfriend at the time had been a psychologist who'd only made it worse.  
  
Lastly she told her about how she'd thought ill of the Colonel, and how she had always regretted her thoughts. When she had finished she had waited for her to answer. None came. "Alecia?"  
  
"I'm here, Harriet." Alecia answered. "I don't see anything wrong with your feelings. They're common. I have another friend who's gone through the same thing. Don't worry about it."  
  
"You sure?" Harriet said between sniffles.  
  
"I'm positive."  
  
Harriet felt relieved. She had in a way been given forgiveness. Alecia had not judged her, and had her feeling human again. Just then she thought to ask her about keeping AJ for the night. "I'm sorry to impose on you, but could you take care of AJ tomorrow night."  
  
"That's not a problem. I get along with kids. I love them!" Alecia agreed.  
  
"Thank you so much. If you come to work tomorrow, you can pick him up."  
  
"Great. No problem, Harriet."  
  
"Thank you."  
  
"My pleasure."  
  
"Goodnight."  
  
"Night." Harriet waited until she had put the phone down until she did the same. Then laying her head down on her pillow she felt as if a heavy morter had been lifted off of her chest. She felt rejuvenated and young again. She picked up the picture on her lap, smiled, put it back in it's place and then closed her eyes and fell asleep. 


	33. 

"You stupid Bitch! What the fuck is this?!"  
  
"It's peas and chicken strips, Daddy." The scared eight year old sat in her seat, her face stricken with fright. Daddy had come home drunk again. Those were the scariest days. They'd been frightening before, but now that Mommy was gone Sarah was truly frightful of what he might do to her, now that his wife had left him.  
  
"You fucking little hoar, you need a good beating, to teach you." His voice slurred with the alcohol. As he approached her she backed up.  
  
"Please, Daddy, no." A tear fell.  
  
"Why are you crying?! I haven't done anything, yet." His sarcastic voice shook her to the bone. She backed up into a wall and then waited for the inevitable. She prayed as he approached her. Her hands clasped together she mouthed a silent plea that someone would save her from the pain. She never took her eyes off of her father. His eyes were glazed over in drunkenness, and his smile was that of the devil. Mac had never seen evil like him.  
  
As he came to stand in front of her, her words became a whisper. He stopped and bent down to hear what she was saying. "God?! You think that there's a God? He doesn't love you, Sarah. No one does, you're not worth it. You're nothing. You can't do anything, and you're not worth anything." Then there was the excruciating pain.  
  
Twack.  
  
Crunch.  
  
Crack.  
  
Between the tears she slid to the floor and blacked out.  
  
When she woke up, her father was snoring on the couch. She got up and holding her arm walked out the door. Thirty minutes later she walked into the General Hospital. She went up to a lady in a white coat, which looked down at her.  
  
"Oh, goodness, you poor thing. Where are your parents?" The doctor asked her, but she didn't answer. Realizing she wasn't going to get one, the doctor asked, "What's your name?"  
  
"She hesitated, but then replied: "Sarah Mackenzie, ma'am." 


	34. 

Hey everyone. sorry it took so long. I've kinda been out of ideas for a while now. I've kinda stopped watching JAG, but decided that it wasn't fair to keep the story unfinished, so you will see an end result. I promise!  
Harm walked up to the sergeant's desk. "Sarah Mackenzie was brought in this evening." He explained.  
  
"The kick-boxer? Yeah, we had to restrain her because she beat up an officer. Who are you?"  
  
"Her boyfriend," He quickly responded. Then, not a second later he added, "and her lawyer."  
  
The man nodded. "Your name, sir?"  
  
"Commander Harmon Rabb Junior." He saw the sergeant's reaction and immediately regretted adding his military rank. "May I see her?"  
  
"She's in the drunk tank at the moment, but sure. If you think you can calm her down, then we'll be grateful."  
  
"I can."  
  
"Good," He ordered a lower-ranking officer to show Harm the way and Harm followed. Seconds later he came face-to-face with Mac. She wasn't his Mac. This was a weak Mac who was too afraid to deal with her own problems. This was a Mac that preferred to drink herself into oblivion. She was cuddled up into a corner with her knees brought up to her chest, Her head resting in them. She looked calm enough, and Harm wondered what the Sergeant had been talking about. However, when the gate opened she was immediately on her feet ready to attack the first person coming in. No doubt that before he had arrived she had probably yelled at everyone and no one in particular.  
  
"Mac?" He slowly walked up to her.  
  
"Harm?" Her voice was soft and child-like. He could tell that she was scared.  
  
"It's me Mac." He turned to the guard, can I remove the hand cuffs?"  
  
The guard looked at him and then nodding, handed over the key. "She can't leave until she's processed tomorrow morning, though."  
  
Harm nodded and took the key. He unlocked the bracelets and then watched as Mac backed up and slid to the ground. He went up to her and sat next to her, pulling her onto his lap.  
  
"Where am I?" She asked. Harm realized that the effect of the alcohol was wearing off, and that she was probably unsure of a lot of things.  
  
"You're in the police drunk tank. Do you remember what happened? You went for a run and then left."  
  
"I remember." Her voice was a whisper. "I'm sorry."  
  
"Me too."  
  
"Can I leave now?"  
  
"No, you're going to be processed. You hit a police officer, Mac."  
  
"He was going to touch me- take me out of here, please, Harm." His heart ached with her pleas.  
  
"Let me see what I can do.| He got her to get up and tucked her under the covers of the bed. Then placing a lingering kiss on her forehead left her in her cell. He turned to the police officer that was doing guard duty and asked: "Where's the officer she best up?"  
  
"I'll see if I can find him. If you could wait in the lobby." Harm did as he was asked. While in the lobby he called the Admiral.  
  
"Chegwidden." He answered the second ring.  
  
"Sir, it's Harm."  
  
"Harm, how's everything going?"  
  
"Not good, sir." Harm ran a hard over his face and through his hair. "Mac went back to drinking. She's been arrested and is in the drunk tank as we speak. I'm trying to get her out."  
  
"Your mother informed me. We're looking for someone to help right now; Harriet's working on it. Let me know how things go."  
  
"Yes sir." They talked briefly about a few other items that had come up and then rug off. Just as Harm had disconnected, a much-battered young man came up to him.  
  
"How may I help you?"  
  
"Officer, my name is Commander Harmon Rabb Junior. I'm with the Navy's Judge Advocate General. Colonel Mackenzie, the woman that attacked you, is my girlfriend. I am also her lawyer. I'd like to explain why she attacked you." The officer had led him to some chairs where they sat down and began to talk.  
  
Harm told him of Mac's abusive childhood, her addiction to alcohol, and her recovery from the disease. He explained Uncle Matt and how he had gotten her to join the marines. Last but not least, he informed the police officer of Uncle Matt's death and the toll it was taking on her, how she had fallen off the wagon and had mistook his touching of her as her father's abusive hand.  
  
The officer listened carefully, not interrupting once. Then at the end he stayed silent for a short while. "Sergeant?" He eventually called.  
  
"Yup?" came the answer.  
  
"Let Miss Mackenzie go. She acted out of grief. There's nothing I can or want to do about it."  
  
"Thank you," Harm said.  
  
"You can thank me later. You owe me commander." The officer told him and then turned to leave. 


	35. 

Harriet poured over the colonel's file. All her superiors had said that good things about her. All had recommended her, but not all of them had taken her as a personal friend. General Siplo and three-star General Danaca. General Spilo had been in the Gulf war with her, and had been very impressed with her work and dedication. Harriet noted that his comments were of a more personal nature reflecting in some personal comments about joining the military the same time as her father and therefore taking her under his wing. There were quite a few letters of recommendation and praises written by General Danaca as well, more so than from General Siplo, however there was no record of how the two knew each other. Therefore with a plane ticket and the current address of the General, Harriet had flown to Pearl Harbor to visit the retired Marine.  
She arrived at the door at three in the afternoon, and knocked. An elderly lady opened it, "Yes, can I help you?"  
"Um, yes, ma'am. My name is Lieutenant J. G. Harriet Simms, I'm looking for General Danaca."  
"George is in the garden, please, come in lieutenant."  
"Thank you, ma'am," Harriet smiled and followed the General's wife through the house and to the garden. The garden was a terrace with a large patch of grass, and she looked upon an elderly man playing with a dog in the middle of the grassy area.  
He looked up when he noticed her standing by the door. "Hello, lieutenant. What can I do for you?" His voice was kind and relaxed as he approached her.  
"Sir, my name is Harriet Simms. I work for the Judge Advocate General in Church Falls."  
"You're a long way out, Lieutenant."  
"Yes sir. I came because of things you wrote in Colonel Sarah Mackenzie's file." That had immediately gotten his attention. "Sir, I was wondering how you know the Colonel, and what your relationship to her is."  
"Why?" He asked suspiciously. "What's wrong with Sarah?"  
"Well, I don't know how well you know Colonel Mathew Mackenzie?"  
"Very well." The general said. "He's in Leavenworth at the moment."  
"No sir. The colonel was receiving treatment for cancer at a hospital nearby. He died yesterday as a result of his illness."  
"Oh, God. How's Sarah taking it?" He was deeply worried now.  
"Not well. I'm afraid she's gone back to drinking, and we were hoping that you might be able to help. Now, how do you know the Colonel?"  
"I've known Sarah ever since she was born. Her father and I are cousins. I'm also her godfather." 


	36. 

"Harm?" Mac called disoriented. "Harm? Are you there?" She heard a far door open and two sets of footsteps. Her call opened and they picked her up. She walked with them, staggering slightly. It wasn't until she was thrown into familiar arms that she knew where she was. "Harm/"  
"Yeah, it's me. We're going back to mom and dad now, Mac. Everything's gonna be fine."  
Mac sighed in relief. She was still disoriented and the car ride made her sick, but as Harm took care of her she felt safe. She had wanted someone to love her for so long, now that she could feel that Harm did, she was not about to give it up. She would fight this addiction and overcome is once and for all... or so she thought, because that night, as Harm slept, the erg to drink reappeared. She lay in bed looking at the ceiling, trying to force her appetite dissipate, but it was in vain. Eventually she gave into the cravings. Therefore, at 3:47 am Mac found herself in the hotel bar with several shots of vodka.  
"The strongest is not the one that overcomes the barrier, but the one that realizes that there is a barrier to be crossed." She twisted the parable and downed the shot. After parable number six, telling herself she was not worthy of Harmon Rabb Junior and all her had to offer a multitude of times, and downing twice as many shots; Mac had lost it and was passed out on the bar. She was pulled from the present into a past reality.  
  
"Do you know what this is?" Her father pushed a glass of liquid into her hand that looked like dark apple juice. "This is bourbon: The all- American drink."  
She sniffed it and looked at it curiously. She lifted the glass to her mouth and took a sip. She hated it. It stung and tasted horrible; but she dared not tell him, so she continued to drink down the liquid that she had been given. Rarely had she seen her father in a mood remotely as well as this one, and she wouldn't waste it.  
This repeated every night, each night a new sort of alcohol. Fist they drank, then he hit her, and then she passed out. The next night it would all start again. The routine. The fights. The drinking. The hangovers.  
Time seemed to fast-forward until the crucial night when she was sixteen. Her father had come home from his job in a foul mood and had immediately taken to the gin. It had been hours before she herself had come home, and when she did it had been with her boyfriend, Chris, in tow. As soon as they got into the door they began groping and making out. Only noticing he was there when she heard his slurring voice.  
"You, slut!" Her father's voice yelled.  
"Fuck off!" She yelled back.  
"So, this is what you do when I'm at work working my ass off, you give anyone and everyone a fuck?! You think I don't know. I've heard talk about it. You're just as bad as your mother!"  
"You know nothing about me!" She yelled back seeing him rise. She looked over at Chris who was still by the door and headed back to him.  
"You come here when I talk to you!" Were the last words she heard before she walked out of the door. 


	37. 

'She's gone again. What do I do now?' Harm sat in their room waiting. Frank had gone looking this time.  
"Harm, did Alecia give you the rings?" Her mother tried to take his mind off what was happening.  
"Yes."  
"And?"  
"Thank you, mom, but I can't marry Mac yet. First of all she has to clean herself up. Then I still have to reach a higher rank. Only then can I propose to her."  
"When you do, tell me. Now, tell me a little about my future daughter- in-law." She asked.  
Harm looked at her dubiously, but finally agreed. "Mac? Well, she's strong, and intelligent. She's the most loyal person I know. She's loyal to the people she knows and to the Marines. She's positive and thinks things through, but most of all she doesn't give up. I love her so much, mom." He sighed. "I'm nothing without her. She makes me whole and a better person."  
"She's wonderful, isn't she?" his mother agreed.  
"She's amazing." He corrected.  
She smiled, seeing the look in her son's eyes. She's seen that look before, but on a different Harmon Rabb. Her first husband always had that look when she walked into the room and she caught his eyes. She'd make a wonderful addition to the Rabb household. They sat there in silence for a moment. The quietness was eating at him, and Harm went to turn on the radio. He fiddled with the dial, and finally fell on a station. "This song, is the saddest one I've ever heard." The DJ said, "I swear I've never met anyone who could keep dry eyed on this one. It's just too horrific to think of, and the worst is that we know that this happens. Here's Martina McBride with Concrete Angel, on light and easy 46.3 FM."  
  
She walks to school with the lunch she packed  
  
Nobody knows what she's holdin' back  
  
Wearin' the same dress she wore yesterday  
  
She hides the bruises with linen and lace  
  
The teacher wonders but she doesn't ask  
  
It's hard to see the pain behind the mask  
  
Bearing the burden of a secret storm  
  
Sometimes she wishes she was never born  
  
Through the wind and the rain  
  
She stands hard as a stone  
  
In a world that she can't rise above  
  
But her dreams give her wings  
  
And she flies to a place where she's loved  
  
Concrete angel  
  
Somebody cries in the middle of the night  
  
The neighbors hear, but they turn out the lights  
  
A fragile soul caught in the hands of fate  
  
When morning comes it'll be too late  
  
Through the wind and the rain  
  
She stands hard as a stone  
  
In a world that she can't rise above  
  
But her dreams give her wings  
  
And she flies to a place where she's loved  
  
Concrete angel  
  
A statue stands in a shaded place  
  
An angel girl with an upturned face  
  
A name is written on a polished rock  
  
A broken heart that the world forgot  
  
Through the wind and the rain  
  
She stands hard as a stone  
  
In a world that she can't rise above  
  
But her dreams give her wings  
  
And she flies to a place where she's loved  
  
Concrete angel  
  
Harm's tears couldn't stop falling as he thought of Mac and all that she'd gone through. He said a silent prayer, thanking god that she was still alive unlike the child mentioned in the song. He thought of the song and it's significance on life and how it had altered him. She was his concrete angel, figuratively. She was the foundation he was built on, the very notion of Harmon Rabb Junior, and without her he would wither and die. He looked up at his mother, who too was in tears, probably thinking along the same lines as him, or otherwise just taken in by the song. He fished out his handkerchief and handed it to her, and then looking back at the radio noticing that there was now a happy jingle of a commercial playing, he turned it off. Moments later there was a knock on the door and Harm sprinted to the door and opened it, where he saw Mac lying in the doorman's arms with Frank right behind. "Please put her on the bed," Frank said to the doorman, who obeyed. Harn just stood there numb. It was only hours later that he would collect himself, until then the lyrics and voice of Martina McBride would plague his mind. 


	38. 

Even though he had left the Marine's years before, Harriet could not seem to find the General's retired life. Having a bag already packed, the General, his wife, and Harriet had left for the military base immediately. It was only when they touched down that Harriet had called the Admiral and her husband to tell them that all was going to plan. On the way to the hotel she briefed her fellow travelers on the situation once more, and trued to prepare them for what was ahead.  
"Get me a marine, Lieutenant." The general said.  
"Sir?" Harriet asked.  
"A marine. Pass me the phone." He ordered and then dialed. "Charlie," he said when he was connected, "It's George Danaca. I need you to send me your best drill sergeant. I'm at the Regency hotel in town. I'll brief him when he arrives. I'll be in the room under Mackenzie."  
Harriet watched as he listened for a bit, watching him smile slightly. "Yes. I'll tell them."  
"General Winslow wants you to tell Admiral Chegwidden that he's sending Matt's body over tomorrow."  
"Thank you, sir. I will relay the message." Harriet said and then sat back quietly for the rest of the drive. She thought about the Colonel, her son's godmother. She'd done as much as she could to prepare the Danaca's. Now she worried if she had prepared herself. What would her best friend look like? Would she even act normally around her? Harriet thought back to another time Mac had fallen off of the wagon, and remembered her attitude back then. However, now she was grieving as well.  
She wished Bud were with her. She always felt so much stronger when he was around. She knew that she could always lean on her husband. With him so far away, she felt so small and helpless. 


	39. 

Deep Purple played on the jukebox behind her. She and Chris swayed to the music as it played, singing along as they went.  
  
We're talking away  
  
I don't know what I'm to say  
  
I'll say it anyway  
  
Today's another day to find you  
  
Shying away  
  
Oh, I'll be coming for your love, OK?  
  
Take on me  
  
take me on  
  
I'll be gone  
  
In a day or two  
  
So needless to say  
  
I'm odds and ends  
  
But that's me stumbling away  
  
Slowly learning that life is OK  
  
Say after me  
  
It's no better to be safe than sorry  
  
Take on me  
  
take me on  
  
I'll be gone  
  
In a day or two  
  
Oh, the things that you say  
  
Is it life or just to play  
  
my worries away  
  
You're all the things I've got to remember  
  
You're shying away  
  
I'll be coming for you anyway  
  
Take on me  
  
You're shying away  
  
I'll be gone in a day  
  
"Hey Sarah, let's go get something to drink!"  
She smiled and turned to her husband "Okay." They'd gotten married last night like all the other drunken runaways that had managed somehow to get to Vegas. She followed as he walked to the bar, which he'd become friends with automatically at their time of arrival. They had blended in in no time between all the other 'social drinkers'. About six drinks and countless conversations later, her husband called her.  
"Sarah, come here." Obediently she got up and walked over to him. "This is Bounce, he's the local dealer."  
"Great, can he get us some joints?"  
"Even better. I can get you heroine." Bounce interjected.  
"Heroine?" Sarah asked unsure.  
"Yeah, I've tried it before," Chris said, "it's the ultimate high."  
"No thanks. None for me, but you go ahead, slick." She told him and then went back to the people she'd been conversing with. All through the conversation she'd look over at them. First she saw him pay. Then the heroine came and he heated it up with a lighter under a spoon. Last but not least he took the needle. She couldn't watch as he injected himself, however she did want to see his reaction. It did look like a great high, but she knew she would never take it. Her body would never withstand such a powerful drug, so, instead she just sat back and watched.  
Later that night, after he'd fucked her and whipped her did she realize how dangerous it was for her. 'But this is what love is right?' she thought not knowing better. 


	40. 

Harm was growing evermore worried now. Mac was tossing and turning, muttering unintelligible phrases, and it looked like she wanted to hurt herself. He was so close to tying her to the bed when there was a knock on the door. He watched as his mother went to open it, and then saw Harriet walk in with two other people. "Harriet." He said. "What are you doing here?"

"The Admiral asked me to find someone that could help, so I did. Commander, this is General Danaca and his wife."

"Sir, ma'am." Harm shook hands with them, wondering what good the General would be.

"Now, while we're waiting for the drill Sergeant, Lieutenant, would you get Admiral Chegwidden on the phone for me."

"Yes sir," Harriet said. "Harm watched as she pulled out a mobile and dialed the number handing it to the General as he went out. The General's wife went to Mac with a bag and started taking her temperature and her blood pressure.

"Harriet?" Harm wondered.

"General Danaca's the Colonel's Godfather and her father's cousin. The Admiral asked me to find someone who was concerned for the colonel." She explained.

"And you did, Harriet." The General's wife said. "I met George in Vietnam, where I was a doctor for the Army, and the first thing he told me about, was the fact that his cousin had just gotten married and tat they'd get pregnant any day now. Of coarse, Sarah wasn't born for quite a few years later. Then when he became her godfather, there was never an end to him talking. If it wasn't for our overseas postings, he would have known about the abuse, and he would never have let anything happen to her. He blames himself for all that's happened to her that's bad. They call and e-mail each other like clockwork. He cares, commander, she's the child we never had." She then went back to work.

Harm kept quiet, thinking: 'maybe this is the best for her. The general will be bale to do more than I will.' Harriet who handed him the phone interrupted his thoughts. "Commander Rabb." He said.

"Commander, I need you to come back." The Admiral's voice cut through to him.

"Sir, I can't, Mac-"

"Is in good hands, and I don't have enough people here. We've got too much work. I want you back with Harriet by tonight, and in the office tomorrow morning."

"Yes, sir." Harm said in defeat.

"Good. I'll see you tomorrow morning, Commander." The admiral said and hung up.

"Commander, your parents are welcome to stay, if they please." The general said. Harm looked over at his mother and Frank, who nodded. Then he looked at Harriet.

"What time is the flight, Harriet?"

"In an hour and a half, sir. We need to leave now."

Harm nodded. "Okay, I'll just pack and then we can get out of here."

"I'll pack for you, Harm. You go talk to Sarah." His mother told him.

"Yes ma'am," Harm said and then went to the bed. He sat on the edge. "Hey, Mac, it's me." He moved a couple invisible strands from her face. "I don't want to leave you, but the Admiral wants me back, and as much as I'd like to disobey orders, I don't think I can disobey General Danaca. Mom'll be here if you need her, and if you need me, I'll only be a plane ride away. Call me and I'll be here as fast as possible. Okay?"

Harm looked around and found that they were alone in the room, save his mother who was packing and he didn't mind her overhearing. "Do you remember the day we first met in the Whitehouse rose garden? I can, as if it were yesterday. You stood there in your uniform between the roses. At first I though you were my ex-girlfriend, but then I realized you were even more beautiful than Meg. I fell for you right then and there!" He chuckled. "Then when the Admiral said we'd be working together, I didn't know whether to strangle him or to kiss his shoes. I was ecstatic that we were going to work together and annoyed at the fact that I'd never get to have an intimate relationship with you, for the same reason I was overjoyed.

"However, now with hindsight I realize that I would never have changes a thing. Intimate became personal because I got to know you like I've never known anyone, and now that we've furthered our relationship I realize that it would never have worked f we'd gotten together six years ago.

"I guess I'm trying to tell you, Mac, is that I love you with all my being: heart, mind, and soul. Get better for me, please." With that Harm leaned over, kissed first her forehead and then her lips, and then seeing that his mother had packed, stood up to leave. "I love you Marine," he said at the door, opened it, and left.


	41. 

"Ready to go, sir?" Harriet asked the commander.

"Just as soon as I say goodbye."

Harriet watches as he shook hands with General Danaca and his wife. Then he gave a hug to his stepfather, and finally a kiss and a hug to his mother. She smiled as she thought about seeing Bud and AJ again.

"Let's go, Harriet."

"Yes, sir." She said and followed him out of the hotel. There was a military transport waiting for them, and it only took seconds for them to load their things and drive off. She looked over at him and smiled.

"Who's taking care of AJ while you're gone Harriet?"

"Well, sir, he goes to day school as you know, and then Alecia picks him up and brings him to our place."

Commander Rabb groaned.

"Don't worry, sir. General Danaca will take good care of the Colonel," I reassured him, thinking that that was what was on his mind.

"Yeah, he will, but I wasn't thinking about that. I was actually thinking about Alecia, and how I haven't even considered how she's doing."

"Well, sir."

"Pardon?"

"Alecia is doing well. She had dinner with Commander Turner and Congresswoman Laythem a couple of days ago. She's staying in the colonel's place in the spare bedroom, and she's helping Bud out with AJ. So, sir, the answer is well." Harriet informed. She laughed at his wide-eyed look. She looked at the watch her mother had gotten her for Christmas and noted the time. "It's lunchtime right now, let's call and see what they're doing, shall we?" Harriet retrieved her cell phone and speed-dialed a number. She waited as it rang twice, and then heard someone pick up.

"Hello?" She heard Alecia's voice.

"Hi, Alecia, it's Harriet, how goes all?"

"Everything's really good. We're having spaghettio's for lunch and then we're off to the zoo. Play school was cancelled today because one of the teacher's was sick, so Bud called me. We're having a great time, aren't we AJ?"

"Who dat?" Harriet could hear in the background.

"It's mommy. Wanna talk to her?"

"Yeah!" He said enthusiastically, and then into the phone, "Hi mommy!"

"Hiya sweety, you being good for Aunt Alecia?"

"Yes. Ant Leesha take me to zoo!"

"Really?"

"Uh-huh. And we went to play ground."

"Wow."

"Yeah." Harriet smiled as she thought about her little angel at home.

"I'll be home soon okay?"

"Kay."

"You wanna speak to uncle Harm?" She asked looking over at her superior who was grinning from ear to ear.

"Yeah!"

"Kay, bye sweety."

"Bye mommy." Harriet smiled and passed the phone over to Harm and then sat back to listen to their conversation.

"Hey buddy. How are you?…. What did you do today?…. Did you make anything?…. Wow, the zoo…. Say hi for the tigers for me…. Can I speak to Aunt Alecia?…. Okay, I'll see you soon buddy."

As the commander talked to his cousin, Harriet zoned out and looked over and out the window to the people and stores they passed by. She admired their simple lives- her's had never been simple. Coming from a very wealthy family she'd been to the finest schools and had everything she ever dreamed of. Even when she had been starting out in the Navy her parents had made sure she had a nice comfortable apartment, with enough spending money to put royalty to shame.

Her life was much simpler now, with Bud. He and AJ filled her life, and anything they had, they had earned. Nice and simple.

Meanwhile Harm had finished his conversation with Alecia and was handing back the phone. "Thanks."

"Not a problem, sir." She sat back and looking outside thought of the life she had at home.

Note: Hi everyone! Thanks for the great feedback. I'm sorry I haven't been keeping up with you guys. I'll try to do better... promise! ;)


	42. 

A rude awakening is having cold water poured onto you and finding yourself in a military community bathroom. Mac looked around and feared the worst: that she'd either been kidnapped by terrorists again, or that her life in JAG had been a dream and that she was once again a recruit in Marine boot camp. Neither was true. She had been kidnapped, however, and she was about to discover who her kidnappers were.

"ATTENTION!" Came the familiar voice of her godfather, and sure enough when she looked up there he was. Automatically Mac got up and stood in attention. "Colonel Sarah Mackenzie, you are going to be trained and turned into a true marine by Drill Sergeant Haines. Do you understand?"

"YES SIR!"

"Good. I'll see you in a couple days, Sarah." Uncle George said and walked out.

"You are under my command. Do you understand!" A new voice took over the shouting.

"YES SIR!"

"I will shape you until you represent a structure we are so proud of. What do you have to say?" The drill sergeant yelled.

"Boyah! Mac screamed at the top of her lungs. 'Bring it on,' she thought. Just like she had during training. Mac was as ready as always to take on a challenge.

"Do you know why you're here?" The sergeant asked.

"Yeah, I've been drinking again."

"Just checking."

"Where's Commander Rabb?"

"Commander Rabb was called back home and his parents are staying on the base, as is General Danaca."

Mac nodded in understanding.

"Okay, now, let's hustle," he said loudening his voice with every word. "I want your bunk unpacked by tomorrow morning's call at 0500."

"YES SIR!"

"Dismissed." He said and then turned. Only minutes after he left, did Mac decide to leave.


	43. 

A rude awakening is having cold water poured onto you and finding yourself in a military community bathroom. Mac looked around and feared the worst: that she'd either been kidnapped by terrorists again, or that her life in JAG had been a dream and that she was once again a recruit in Marine boot camp. Neither was true. She had been kidnapped, however, and she was about to discover who her kidnappers were.

"ATTENTION!" Came the familiar voice of her godfather, and sure enough when she looked up there he was. Automatically Mac got up and stood in attention. "Colonel Sarah Mackenzie, you are going to be trained and turned into a true marine by Drill Sergeant Haines. Do you understand?"

"YES SIR!"

"Good. I'll see you in a couple days, Sarah." Uncle George said and walked out.

"You are under my command. Do you understand!" A new voice took over the shouting.

"YES SIR!"

"I will shape you until you represent a structure we are so proud of. What do you have to say?" The drill sergeant yelled.

"Boyah! Mac screamed at the top of her lungs. 'Bring it on,' she thought. Just like she had during training. Mac was as ready as always to take on a challenge.

"Do you know why you're here?" The sergeant asked.

"Yeah, I've been drinking again."

"Just checking."

"Where's Commander Rabb?"

"Commander Rabb was called back home and his parents are staying on the base, as is General Danaca."

Mac nodded in understanding.

"Okay, now, let's hustle," he said loudening his voice with every word. "I want your bunk unpacked by tomorrow morning's call at 0500."

"YES SIR!"

"Dismissed." He said and then turned. Only minutes after he left, did Mac decide to leave.


	44. 

It bothered him that he'd left her. It seemed as if he'd always deserted her when she needed him the most. Grandma always said that actions spoke louder than words, and all his actions contradicted what he said. He recalled all those times: when her father had died, when her ex-husband's death had been framed on her, and when Mic had left her. It wasn't only unfair, but also discouraging. How could he ever be the perfect person for her, if he was constantly no-where to be seen when she needed his help and support. It ate him up, and that's why he refused to eat.

"Harm, you okay?" Alecia's voice broke through his thoughts.

"Yeah I'm just not that hungry." He picked at his food. He looked over at his godchild who seemed to be enjoying what he was eating, and ate a healthy portion of the food in front of him. Harm had promised a bedtime story later, and would fulfill his duties. That done, he would have Alecia drive him home. All he wanted to do was call Mac and talk to her.

So, as expected, he read a little to AJ, and then making sure he was asleep, Harm snuck out of the room and went back to the living room.

"He sleeps so peacefully." Harm said. Harriet and Bud smiled, sitting on the two-seater together. Alecia was however nowhere to be seen.

"Where's Alecia?" Harm asked.

"She went back to Mac's place. She has a breakfast meeting tomorrow morning, so she took a cab home." Bud stated.

"Oh."

"She left your car out front and the keys are on the dresser in the entrance hall."

"Would you like some coffee, sir?" Harriet asked, mug in hand.

"That would be great, Harriet, thanks." He said and sat down in the armchair, not wanting to seem too eager to leave. "So, Bud, how's work, what's going on?"

"Well, let's see. Commander Turner left today for South Carolina. A marine murdered his wife, so he's looking into that, Singer fells like she's in heaven. With Commander Turner gone her workload has doubled. She's feeling important at the moment. Tiner's taking his bar exam tomorrow, so the Admiral gave him the day off. I've got a car-jacking by a pair of drunken sailors, a bar brawl, and I have paperwork in a dozen other cases, not to mention that I have to keep Commander Turner's cases alive." Bud sighed. Harm understood why the Admiral asked him to come back, even if he didn't really want to.

After his cup of coffee, Harm said goodbye to Bud and Harriet and went home. He drove as fast as he could without getting caught and then rushed up to his apartment to call Mac. He found his mother's cell-phone number and dialed.

On the third ring she picked up. "Hello?"

"Mom, it's Harm," he said nervously.

"Harm, I'm glad you cot home all right. Sarah's right here. She's having dinner with us before she has to check-in."

"Check-in?" Harm asked confused.

"We're on a military base. Frank and I are staying in one of the houses, and Sarah's in the woman's bunker."

"WHAT!" he yelled, and then heard as his mother conversed with someone on her end.

"Harm?" Mac's voice was like velvet to him.

He sighed with relief, "Mac, are you alright?"

"I need a drink, Harm. They won't give me one. I hurt." Her voice shook him to the core.

"I know Mac, but you need to get well. What are you doing there anyway? A military facility is probably the last place I want you."

"I'm a marine, Harm. If I'm told to do something, I do it. They want me to get over my problem in the marine way, then that's what I'll do. They've got a whole program set up for me."

"I guess that I just don't like that thought of you being all the way over there and me being here."

"Harm, do you miss me?" Mac asked sarcastically.

"Damn right, I do." He responded seriously. It's tearing me apart, Mac. I feel so helpless here in my apartment."

"Don't be, Harm. You're doing so much for me/ I'm doing this for you. I would have run away by now, otherwise. I want to be with you and I know that the only way that I'm going to be able to truly love you is if I get over my drinking problem once and for all. I love you, Harm, and you being over there waiting for me is the strongest moral support I'll ever need."

"I love you Mac."

"I know."

"I'm here waiting."

"And I'll be there soon."

"You know where to find me."

"Goodnight, Harm. I'll call you tomorrow."

"Goodnight, Mac. I can't wait until then."


	45. 

"Bud, isn't something like this supposed to bring couples closer?" Harriet asked her husband as she walked into their bedroom after checking on their son.

"If they weren't a couple to begin with, I don't see how it would." He answered.

"They've become closer, but there is no indication that it's not just because they're friends. After all, if that were us, the Colonel and Commander would be just as concerned."

"That's true."

"I'm losing hope of getting them together like that at all. What if it's all in vain? What if it's all in vain? What if it doesn't work?"

"And what if we run out of toothpaste?" Bud cut in. "What ifs are going to get you nowhere. We can't see into the future, Harriet. It's all a bunch of Trial and Error: we try one way, and if it doesn't wonk we try another, and another, until we get something that does work. The only way we're going to know if it works between them is if we can get them together in the first place. They'll figure it out, dear, don't worry." Harriet allowed herself to be pulled closer to him in bed.

"I guess we're just lucky, huh?" Harriet asked.

"I guess we are."


	46. 

Mac had been away from Harm in 3 months, and hadn't had a drop of liquor in all that time. Though she felt proud of herself, she was also tired and frustrated. Her life had been the same for the past few months.

The beginning of the day on a military base is 0500. In the summer it isn't so bad, because the bugle is blown at around the same time as daybreak. The rest of the year however, one isn't so lucky.

The 0500 role call startled Mac awake. She rolled out of bed along with fifty other women in her bunkhouse. The lights went on and a females drill sergeant walked in. "All right, ladies, let's get out. Mackenzie, you're to meet Sergeant Haines two clicks away from the training ridge.

"Aye ma'am." Mac yelled and jogged out and to her rendezvous point, where Haines met her.

"Morning, Colonel." He said calmly.

"Morning Drill Sergeant." Mac answered as calmly as he had. "What's on the tab for today?"

"Did you sleep well?"

"No."

"Do you still want a drink?"

"Yes." There was no point in lying.

"Okay, here's the deal. I'm going to work you in a combat style war game. You'll be given a regular package of food that would regularly be given. I'll give you a team as well. All men. The reason for that is that I've never heard of a tactical unit with more than one woman. So, you have till 1300 hours tomorrow off to do what you'd normally be doing when you go into war, and then you'll be briefed in the auditorium. Understand?"

"Yes sir."

"This morning we're going to go through a routine course. We'll time you to see if you can make it into the 10 minutes that are given to women. The steps are in the course as well, and you're to use them if necessary, understood?"

"Understood."

She watched as Danford nodded and then led her to the beginning of the course. She glanced over at what she had to do: car tires, a wall, bar swinging and army crawl under barbed wire.

She took a deep breath and got herself into a ready position to start. Concentrating on what was ahead, she jerked forward as soon as she heard the whistle. She ran to the tires and quickly tiptoed through them. Then she ran to the wall. She looked up and pushed the steps a little further away from the wall, then with a run she ran up the two steps and launched herself at the wall. She caught the top with her hands and then hanging there for a second began to pull herself up. She dropped down the other side and ran to the bars, and getting a firm grip quickly got to the other side. Lastly she headed for the barbed wire. She got down onto her stomach and army crawled her way through. Her uniform got stuck on the barbed wire, and she had to stop to undo herself when it just wouldn't rip. Taking what seemed like forever she finally ran back to the Drill Sergeant, finishing the course.

She was breathing heavily, taking deep breaths to calm herself down.

"Nine minutes and thirty five seconds," she heard, "well done."

"Good. Dismissed." Haines said. "Go put some clothes on and we'll have breakfast with your in-laws."

"In-laws?" Mac asked, and then understood. "They're not my in-laws. They're my partner's parents. I have no family left, except for General Danaca, so Harm's parents take care of me."

"You and the Commander involved?"

"That's none of your business."

"Sorry ma'am."

"S'okay." She waved for him to forget about it.

They were quiet for a little while as they jogged back to the barracks. Mac went in, took a shower, and changed into camouflaged cargos and a green t-shirt. Then she went to Harm's parent's place.

"Sarah," Mom said exasperated, "Why do they start so early here? I was scared that we might go to war. I'm not used to this anymore. It's been so long since I've lived on a base."

Mac smiled. "Sorry mom. It's a marine thing. Is Haines here yet?" Mac gave her a kiss on the cheek.

"Not yet. "

"Dad around?" She asked looking for the elder man.

"Let me go and see if Frank is ready," she smiled at Mac and retreated into a room. Mac followed and sat on the couch in the living room. She saw a copy of the 'Marine Code' in the table and picked it up. She remembered how her father had read to her from it every night before going to bed, and commenting on each one as he went along, stating how important it was, or how it was a load of horse crap. They'd gone through it four times and she'd memorized every regulation as a child. She could still recall the majority of them. She smiled thinking about the good days as a child, before the alcohol overtook her dear daddy, and he had begun to abuse her and mom.

Her thoughts were interrupted with a knock on the door. Mac got up and opened it up for Danford. They sat down after exchanging pleasantries and sat down to wait, Mac returning to the same place she had been seated in previously.

"Have you called your partner yet?" He asked.

"Not yet. I thought I'd do that after breakfast."

He nodded and finding nothing more to say sat back and looked around the room.

Mac turned back to the regulations book reading different parts of it.

"Good morning Sarah," Dad's voice reached her ears, and she got up and smiled placing the book back onto the table.

"Good morning, Dad." Mac smiled and gave him a kiss on the cheek. "How's the financial world?" She asked as thy walked to the mess hall.

"Miserable. I think I might have to leave today. Our shares went down by a lot and we need to get investors. However, I've told them that I'm not leaving unless it's absolutely necessary. "

"Good," Mom said, "We're here for Sarah. No matter if Frank has to leave, though, I'm staying, okay?"

"Thank you." Mac said hugging her. Then followed Danford through the doors of the mess hall.


	47. 

Every time he wanted to pick up the phone and call her, something came up. First of all he woke up late, so he was forced to go to work without hearing her voice first, as he had so been counting on the night before. Arriving at JAG headquarters, he walked in late to a staff meeting. Which seemed to piss the Admiral off. Leaving him with doubts about the rest of the day. The meeting seemed to go on forever. So much so, that by the time they had finished he had to be briefed about the current cases by Bud. That went rather quickly though, as the Lieutenant had to be in court soon after. Just as he sat down to work, or rather pick up the phone to call his marine, there was a knock on the door, and he looked up to see Alecia standing there looking at him a little flustered.

"Hey Harm," she said, "how about lunch? I have to look at the place I'm buying for my newest installment for my chain, and I thought that you'd like to come."

"Well-" He started.

"You said you'd draft me my contract, so I thought you might like to see it. It might help with the drafting. Plus, There's a place across the street that has Northern Indian Vegetarian that I'm told is to die for."

Harm looked at the phone on his desk, then at the work in front of him, and eventually just gave up and got up. "All right, Alecia," he said, then pushing Mac and his work into the back of his mind he smiled and followed her out of the JAG office, leaving a note with Bud that he was going to take a long lunch and that he'd be back towards the end of the afternoon.

They drove into DC, and down the block from the FBI headquarters they parked the car and met up with the owner of the shop.

"Harm," Alecia said, "I'd like you to meet a David Kerman, and the owner of the building I'm buying."

"Sir." Harm said.

"David, this is my cousin Harmon Rabb Junior, and also my lawyer in this matter."

"It's a pleasure to meet you Mr. Rabb," they shook hands firmly. Then turning towards the building he said: "Would you like to see it now?"

"Sure." Alecia said with a smile.

Harm noticed just how happy she was to buy the building. Her eyes sparkled and her smile was so bright that it brought out her eyes. He smiled thinking of how lucky that marine could be if he got himself in gear, and how he would kill him if he ever did anything to his younger cousin.

He followed them making mental notes of things that would have to be drafted into the contract. The place had just been remodeled and looked wonderful. And Alecia seemed to be really pleased with it too.

"So, what do you think?" David asked.

"I think it's wonderful. I'll take it. Harm will draft the contract and have you using it."

"I should have it done in a couple days. If I could have your phone number I can call you when it's ready to be signed." Harm said and then took down the man's number.

"Thank you, David," Alecia said as they left.

"No, thank you, Alecia. I've been trying to put it on the market for a while, and I couldn't find anyone I wanted to sell it to, but I love your business and I think you'll do my building justice."

"I'll certainly try." She smiled, and then all shaking hands, the cousins took their leave.

The Indian restaurant that Harm found himself in was above and beyond. He'd never had such good food, nor had had enjoyed himself so much. His mind caught himself though, he had had such good times: with Mac. He really missed her and was dieing to talk to her.

"What's wrong, Harm?" Alecia asked over coffee.

"Mac. I didn't want to leave her, and I miss her."

"Don't worry. She'll be back soon. Have you called her yet?"

"No. I haven't had the chance today. I'll go back to the office and lock myself in and call her."

"That sounds like a good idea." Alecia smiled, and then paying for the bill, which Harm tried to talk her out of, they went their separate ways.

Harm got back into the office, and was thrown into court by the Admiral to second chair Sturgis because Bud was interviewing a defendant. He sat through the whole trial thinking of how he wanted to talk to Mac. Then, just as he was heading back to his office, Bud called him for some help. At a certain point he had had enough, and the commander closed his office door leaving everyone out of his office and called his mother's phone.

No one picked up.

Normally he'd just try again and get over it, but this was different. He hadn't wanted to leave Mac. If it weren't for Harriet having been there, he would have blown off the whole thing and just stayed with his mom and step dad to help Mac. Now Mac was in the care of some unknown Marine, and Harm didn't like it. He picked up the phone and tried again.

Nada.

If it didn't work the third time he'd go crazy, but just as he picked up the phone Bud walked in.

"Not now, Bud." Harm told him sternly.

"Yes, sir. It's just that Colonel Mackenzie's on the loudspeaker in the Admiral's office-"

Harm didn't even hear the rest. He bolted from his office, cutting across the bullpen and into his CO's office. The minute he entered he heard the voice of the woman he held so dear.

"-Everything's going well, sir: It's like being back home. There's five o'clock wake up calls and the bad food. Nothing's changed here."

"Glad to hear it colonel. Commander Rabb just walked into my office, and I'm sure he'd like to talk to you. Plus, I have to be in court." The admiral started packing up his things.

"In court sir?" Mac asked.

"Yeah, a navy pilot killed a senator's grandson, so I'm defending. I'll leave the two of you. Get well soon, colonel."

"Aye Sir." Mac answered. There was a long silence as the JAG left the room. Once the door closed behind him Harm said:

"Mac, are you okay?"

"I'm fine Harm. It's difficult. The girls in my barrack went out for drinks and it took so much out of me to stay behind. I was so tempted."

"I know. I spent the whole day trying to call you, but everyone else was taking up my time. I was so worried about you."

"Don't be. I'm going to be far away from alcohol for the next few days."

"Why, what's going on?"

"I'm going into a war game tomorrow." Her voice had a hint of excitement, as well as what harm took to be apprehension.

"WHAT!"

"Yeah, it's going to be fun. The Canadian Marines are coming down and we're gonna play 'Saving Private Ryan'.

"Mac, you're not ready for this!" Harm protested.

"of coarse I am/ I'm trained for this, Harm"

"But Mac-"

"No buts. I'm being told to do this, so that's what I'll do. I love you though," she said lifting the atmosphere.

"I love you too." Harm said in defeat. "Take care of yourself, though."

"I will."

"How's my mom, and Frank? They taking good care of you?"

"Dad left this afternoon. He had to go back, the stock market seemed almost unfixable, he said. Mom's doing great. She's around somewhere. You want to talk to her?"

"Tell her I'll call her tonight."

"Okay." There was a pause, where Mac was talking to someone on her end. "Harm? I have to go. I've got to go through maneuvers. I love you. I miss you."

"You too, Mac. I miss and love you."

"I'll call you when I get back. Bye Flyboy. Keep out of trouble."

"You too, Marine, and keep safe."

"I will. Bye."

"Bye."

Mac hung up the phone and Harm listened to the beep of the disconnection. He put his head in his hands and wished for all his love's pain to go away.


	48. chapter 48

Harriet couldn't believe her ears. She looked at Tiner, whose eyes were just as wide as hers. Had she heard right? Had the two people she'd days before been conspiring against just declared to each other that they loved each other? Scratch that, they'd done it as if they'd said those words a thousand times before. All of a sudden she felt miserable. She'd been eavesdropping. Hearsay, except that Tiner'd heard it too and that the Admiral had told them to listen in case she hadn't told the Admiral the truth, hoping that everything was alright. They hadn't expected this though.

"Harm? I have to go. I've got to go through manoeuvres. I love you. I miss you."

"You too, Mac. I miss and love you."

"I'll call you when I get back. Bye Flyboy. Keep out of trouble."

"You too, Marine, and keep safe."

"I will. Bye."

"Bye." Harm's voice was but a whisper and seconds later Harriet heard the click of the speakerphone being turned off. That was her clue to split. She nodded to Tiner and then walked away from the Admiral's waiting room and straight to her husband.

"Bud, are you doing anything terribly important?"

"Um, well, no, I guess." His baby-face looked up from what he was focused on.

"Good. I need to go for a walk. Come with me." She look his hand and pulled him up.

"Actually, Harriet, why don't we go home?"

"Okay." She went to her desk and grabbed her handbag. Then stopping by Tiner's office on the way back to Bud, she let the petty officer know that they were heading out.

When they got to the car Harriet couldn't contain herself anymore. "The colonel and the commander are in love."

"You knew that Harriet, you've been trying to get them together for eons." Bud told her.

"No Bud, that's not what I mean. I mean-"

"Take a deep breath and start over, Harriet."

She nodded, breathed in and released. "When the colonel called, the Admiral thought that she might have lied about her condition, so he asked Tiner and I to listen in to make sure she was okay."

"Harriet!" He said appalled.

"It was an order." She countered.

"So, go on."

"Well, what I really didn't expect was that I'd hear the commander and colonel tell each other that they loved each other."

"This is good news, though. It's what everyone wanted.

"No, this is bad, Bud! What if they get discovered? They might have to go to court. The Colonel is higher ranking than the commander. They might be forced apart. Either in the field or out."

"What do you want to do about it then, Harriet?" Bud wondered.

"Tell the Admiral."


End file.
